Seeing the sexy eleven year old in the fullness of glorious nakedness has me completely amazed and stunned. Not only because I was seeing a naked body for the first time ever, but also because of the stiff cut erection that barely moved around since it was so hard when Jamie shifted. Beneath the rigid erection was a tight boy pouch about the size of a racquetball, maybe slightly larger like a jumbo sized chicken egg. My eyes are riveted on Jamie's eleven year old erection as I try to process this new information realizing that 'she' is actually a 'he.' My own erection suddenly twitches with excitement while I continue to watch him. For an eleven year old he's really got a pretty big erection. I mean of course I've never seen another boy's penis before, other than my own, but his most definitely was bigger than mine with me swallowing hard watching him move towards his clothes while my mind worked a million miles an hour.
Jamie was stunningly beautiful in all of his statuesque nakedness. The boy was about four feet six inches tall a typical height for a kid his age, but only weighed around seventy to seventy five pounds keeping him a bit on the lean side. He wasn't skinny or anything; rather he had a very sleek and fit kind of build with nice thin sinewy legs. His arms matched the wiry aspects of his legs, but everything seemed to fit proportionally on his lanky frame. His sexy tight tummy and chest seemed to amplify the sultriness of his physique. Then there was the whole issue of his boy spike. It was large, or rather, it seemed kind of big to me for an eleven year old boy. I wasn't in a position to really know what was considered large or anything by any means, but I did know it was bigger than my own erection which I was currently stroking absentmindedly.
The reminder of what I was doing forced me to stop masturbating myself before I blew a cork unexpectedly. Panting for air I had been a lot closer to doing just that than I had realized, my body quivering in protest at the sudden stop in the stimulation. Slowly I managed to pull back from the precipice of my impending euphoric climax while I continued to gawk at Jamie's hard erection in shock and awe.
It was an amazing work of art. His hard tubular appendage angling upwards against his pale bare pubic mound was bigger than my own three and a half inch erection that was currently stretched to its limits so fully engorged with blood that it almost hurt. Sizing up the eleven year old boy's rigidness I figured it must be a good four inches long maybe even bigger. Instinctively I got the impression that his stiff wand would be more typical of what a thirteen year old boy might have between his legs. Of course I simply couldn't be sure not having anything to compare Jamie's erection to other than my own. Lately this has been an ongoing curiosity on my part so I added looking up on the internet what is considered an average penis size on boys to my growing lists of things to research.
Jamie's pinkish brown erection looked about the same thickness as mine; maybe a little fatter so I suppose it was actually slightly bigger than a roll of half dollars. As I thought about it, since it seemed a bit thicker than mine I figured it had to be closer to about the same thickness as a roll of silver dollars because mine seemed sort of in-between the two. I suppose his shaft was probably a normal thickness for its size, but with a small sized head it almost looked almost like it's been stretched. From across the room it seemed like his small projectile shaped knob wasn't as wide as his shaft, making his overall penis size appear much bigger. His tip was more pointed than mine, yet still sort of round like, kind of reminding me of a stretched out bullet.
This thought piques my interest even further with me now focusing my attention on the tip of his glans. Even though he had a small knob it appeared very smoothly rounded making his glans look like a stretched out bullet similar in shape to a thirty-eight special caliber slug. The only reason why I knew this was because I had done a report at the beginning of the school year on the progression of the police force in our country. Of course I included firearms and ammunition so when I had looked that information up I had come across all sorts of different kinds of bullets. In essence I had a fairly decent knowledge now of the various different calibers used in all sorts of areas not only in private life, but also for military and police use, and Jamie's knob most definitely had the same attributes in regards to the shape of a thirty-eight special bullet.
Focusing my attention now to the rest of Jamie's hard penis I noticed his shaft had a slight upwards curve to it angling almost straight upwards his glans practically bumping up against his hairless pale creamy white smooth pubic mound. It wasn't a big bend or anything, more like a natural kind of bow actually being more straight than curved. The base of his shaft looked like it was growing straight up from his tight racquet ball sized boy sack that snuggled up firmly against his body. The leathery skin on his small purse was pulled so tightly that at first I couldn't make out his testicles, but then when he shifted his weight with his legs coming together it caused them to squeeze up against the lining of his boy bag revealing the outline of cherry sized testicles.
My heart was pounding in my chest now not only at the sexiness of the situation, but because of something else I couldn't quiet figure out. It was like Jamie held a spell over me. Yes he was very sexy and turned me on like nothing imaginable, but there was something else, much more with something giving way deep down inside of me. I've never felt anything like this before. There was a seed of deep affection beginning to take root deep down inside the core of my being. I recognized it as a sort of love and affection type of feeling, but perhaps deeper, somehow more. It wasn't necessarily love in the kind we think of with couples, but still deeper like in a familial kind of way or maybe slightly more. There was this overpowering sense of protectiveness I felt towards Jamie at the moment. Deep down in my heart I knew I'd protect this little kid with every last fiber of my soul. He was special in every sense of the word who had somehow managed to wrap himself around my heart without uttering a word to me.
There were all sorts of conflicting emotions running rampant at the moment inside of my body and mind. It was so consuming that it made my head spin. This beautiful boy made me lust sexually for him while at the same time evoked such controlling protective instincts deep down inside of me. The sexiness of the moment had me yearning for his touch and embrace, something of which I instinctively knew wasn't remotely possible. The cruelty of it all made me whimper as I gazed at his magnificent naked exquisiteness. It made me ache for his tender embrace and love, which I knew simply would in all likelihood never come to pass due to the way he was wired mentally.
I continued to watch him, his hard erection appealingly inviting while I thought about what it would be like for me to slip my damp lips over his hardness. The mere thought of such an action made me gasp with excitement, but deep down I knew this would never be a possibility. Not only because for Jamie the mere physical contact from someone else made him recoil and shy away almost like his senses couldn't handle such overriding sensations, but also because the nature of the entire situation. I'd never take advantage of the boy in this way. Besides, if the mere act of touching the kid made him react so violently, what would touching him in a sexual way do to him? From what little information I've gathered before I came over it was like his senses were in a heightened state that was extremely intense, about a thousand times more than it was for regular people. So if he were stimulated in a sexual way by someone else it could have disastrous affects.
This now brought my thoughts in a different direction because I realized Jamie was getting to that age where puberty would start to set in for him. It made me wonder how this would begin to affect him. Would he even know what sex is much less act on it? I mean even the physical process of masturbation; would he even comprehend what this was or understand the act itself. As things stood now it was obvious that he seemed aware of personal stimulation on some level, but exactly how much I wasn't so sure about. After all I had just seen him do just that, or at least go about it in some way.
Of course I didn't actually see him jacking off or anything per se, but from behind it was obvious that he had actually stroked and touched his penis with his hand for a bit, the result of which was with him become fully erect, if that huge hard thing currently standing straight up in the air was any indication. I had to assume that not only had he rubbed himself into an erection, but that perhaps he had continued to stimulate himself once hard in some fashion since his hand had been working on himself several times while I had watched him standing there with his back turned towards me.
Puberty was a confusing enough matter for us boys who were so called considered sane or wired correctly, but for an autistic boy, what exactly does that mean for someone like Jamie. Hell, at times it was all I could do from pulling out my pecker at any one moment and go at it, but the overpowering sense of doing something so humiliating out in the open and in public was enough for me to curb such urges. Autistic kids tend to have all sorts of behavior issues, and from what I understood sometimes didn't have the capability of distinguishing what was appropriate behavior and what wasn't. I mean Jamie standing right here at the moment was a perfect example. No normal boy in his right mind would be stripped completely naked exposing his hard erection with someone else in the room who was a virtual stranger.
Hell as it was even I was embarrassed about the situation at the moment. Not because of Jamie being naked because if truth be told that was wickedly awesome for me. No, it was rather because I was currently sporting a huge erection of my own beneath this blanket. The mere thought of me being hard as a rock, while gawking at Jamie's full blown erection, made me a bit nervous. I mean what if someone could tell I had an erection, and no less because of me seeing another naked boy, even if it was Jamie himself who knew it. Of course I understood that he probably couldn't understand about such things, but still, the embarrassment about my own naked vulnerabilities is what made things different between boys like myself and many autistic boys.
All of these jumbled thoughts flashed through my mind in a split second. It was amazing how a person's brain can work these things out within moments as once more my thoughts came rushing back to reality when I heard Jamie's voice. He had just turned towards his clothes giving me an unobstructed view of his lusciously smooth seductively alluring naked boyhood.
"Clothes…I need my clothes." Jamie calmly spoke to no one in particular moving towards his garments with his hard penis pointing almost straight up into the air.
His large piston was extremely rigid so it hardly moved around when the eleven year old boy shuffled towards his chair. His nice tight boy bag is scarcely disturbed since it is snuggled up closely to his body forming a nice firm ball in front of him. It was strange noticing these types of things, but for me this was a new experience and I was soaking it all in despite it probably being a bit creepy.
Jamie leaned over the chair retrieving his underwear the tip of his penis brushing up just below his innie belly button. He has a very firm stomach, and when he leans over I can actually see his muscles bunching up which kind of surprises me. Most boys at this age don't even have those sorts of muscles, but maybe working on the farm with lifting things and moving them around it has sort of given him a muscular physique. He was so fit that even his ribs were clearly defined on his wiry body. Everything about him pointed to an otherwise healthy young eleven year old boy. If it weren't for his autism, he'd be a typical farm boy.
I continue to study him watching him pick up a pair of regular white boy's briefs, bend over slightly, and slip his legs through the openings slowly tugging his underwear upwards. He has shifted now so that he was facing me square on giving me an unobstructed view of everything. As he begins to straighten up I'm once more placed in a state of shock and awe at the statuesque quality of his physique in every aspect.
The muscles along his tight stomach and small frame seem to ripple in such an uncharacteristic way for a boy his age, much less one who is supposedly mentally handicapped in some fashion, or rather wired differently since this really wasn't considered a mental handicap by many politically correct minded people out there. Shaking my head these sorts of things always crept up in the school atmosphere making me want to gag sometimes of the absurdity of this whole politically correct crap teachers were always spouting off and forcing down our throats during their lectures.
Of course the shape and size of his hard erection also has me perplexed with the exquisiteness of its creation. The more I gazed at it the more I realized it was beautiful and perfectly placed on the small eleven year old boy. Even his large tight boy satchel evoked a sense of rightness for a boy his age and stature.
Jamie tugged on the front of his white boy's briefs holding it out a little so that it could slip over his rock hard tube while the back part of his underwear slowly dragged upwards along the backside of his thighs. He bent his knees slightly dipping downwards forcing his butt to stick outwards somewhat pulling the front of his underwear over the top of his erection and boy pouch. Allowing the waistband to settle in place he runs both of his thumbs along the stretchy band of his briefs toward the back and slowly straightens up shoving his hips forward before pulling on the back of his underwear until they slide over his two cute little orbs.
With his hips shoved forward his straight slightly upwards curved large four inch cut bulge presses up against the cottony material revealing the outlined shape of his hardness as it settles up against his body in an upright position. I could even make out the shape of his thin short bullet shaped nozzle. I don't know what's sexier, seeing him completely naked, or seeing the outline of his big erection pressing up against the tightness of his briefs. I continue to gape at him while he dips downwards bending his knees a little allowing his tight underwear to settle properly around his body and boy baubles while his delicate fingers tug on the snug fabric getting himself adjusted properly. As if his erection wasn't stimulating enough, my penis twitched even more when I now noticed the outline of his jumbo egg sized satchel pushing against the material. His underwear fit so snugly to his body there was no denying that those two cherry sized oval shaped outlined receptacles were his testicles.
Just watching him get dressed had me all worked up with its infatuated sexiness. It amazes me that I hadn't recognized sooner that he was a boy and not a girl. Looking at him now there was no mistaking that he was most definitely all boy despite his long hair and sleek almost feminine like features. There was a softness and sweetness about him, but there most definitely was no mistaking he was all 'boy' with what he had swinging between his legs and the sleek fitness of his torso.
"Get dressed," Jamie comments reaching for a regular pair of jeans quickly slipping his legs inside of them and tugging them upwards.
As he pulls the jeans upwards he leans backwards shoving his hips outwards showing off his hard covered boy package briefly before it disappears from sight. With a firm tug on his jeans they slip into place while he wriggles his hips.
"Zip closed," he instructs himself pulling up his zipper before snapping the closure on his pant clasps.
The jeans fit him perfectly around the waist and the length of his legs. They fit snuggly around his midriff showing off his perky butt not to mention his decent sized boy bulge. Of course his erection pressed up against the strong material of his pants creating a nice outlined shape of his penis. I've noticed that people around here didn't seem to wear baggy trousers like many kids did in the city. It was common practice for kids to wear pants that were way too big and sagged around the hips threatening to fall off where I lived, but over here people seemed to wear their slacks so that they fit nicely around their body the way it was supposed to be.
Next he leans over picking up a broad horizontal blue colored short sleeved pullover shirt. It had alternating bands of Navy blue and sky blue broad stripes all the way across. They weren't solid stripes, but rather wide bands with the blue color of one bleeding into the blue color of the other strip. He fiddles around with it for a moment straightening it out before slipping his arms inside. Just as he begins to pull it over his head he seems to recognize that it is backwards so shifts his shirt around slipping his arms in the correct holes this time. He pulls the shirt over his head allowing it to settle over his shoulders before pulling his long hair out from underneath the material. Jamie's long mane hangs over his shoulder and back as he shakes his head a little letting it get settled properly.
Reaching over for his socks he quickly slides his feet into a pair of regular white ones with blue and red stripes around that calf before standing up. Doing it this way required some balance making me realize that at least he wasn't a clumsy sort either. He even pulled the legs of his jeans back over his socks once he had them slipped on which seemed odd for someone who supposedly shouldn't be able to recognize such things. Add to that when he had realized he was putting his shirt on backwards it also made me wonder just how aware the boy really was with what he was doing.
The way he moved around and spoke you'd never think the boy was autistic. It was as if during this time of day while he was getting dressed he was a bit more normal like any other boy who gets up and dressed in the mornings. At least he was able to dress himself recognizing the right way and wrong way of doing things, which seemed to indicate there was some sort of coordinating and reasoning abilities going on with him.
Completely dressed now, looking like a typical eleven year old boy, Jamie surveys the room like he was contemplating the situation. He reaches up towards the back of his head and grabs his hair flicking it about trying to pull out any stray strands that were still tucked up under the back of his shirt.
"That's better…dressed." He notes looking around catching a glimpse of Boxey while continuing to scan the room.
"Dog…house…clothes…," He comments pausing for a split second running his hands over the front of his shirt.
His right hand brushes across the front of his chest while his left hand dips downwards pressing up against his erection; the boy's delicate fingers tracing along the outline of his rigid four inch tube like he was confirming something. "Me," He finishes off the observation he had started earlier making me frown.
It was like he was acknowledging his existence by identifying his current situation and location, but him actually running his fingers along the outline of his erection had me a bit puzzled. To me this seemed to confirm that there was more going on in Jamie's mind than first meets the eye. I mean there had to be some sort of intelligent thought going on in his head. Again I had only briefly researched autism, but knew that there were many high functioning autistic kids leading relatively normal lives to some extent. I mean they all had some sort of issues even as a high functioning autistics, but Jamie evidently was considered on the fringes of being in the 'extreme' classification of autism, which is the opposite spectrum of high functioning, so this didn't make sense to me. It was obvious he had the capability of communication in a thought out kind of way. Even though the conversation had been with himself it still demonstrated reasoning capabilities. From my brief research it had started becoming complicated with how kids with autism were rated. When it became convoluted I had stopped at that point, but I had done enough to realize the varying degrees where kids tended to fall.
It was now getting to be frustrating since I didn't know enough about autism and without internet access it would be difficult to learn more until I could get to the library with the computers and internet access Uncle Walt had told me about.
"Dark…it's still dark." Jamie commented looking around in the softly lit bedroom.
It indeed was still dark outside so the only light in the room was from a small lamp sitting on the small table next to the foot of Jamie's bed. It was enough illumination to see clearly, but it was a soft kind of glow. Jamie walked over to the steps flipping on the lights making me blink momentarily until I adjusted to the intensity of the illumination.
"Light…happy." Jamie sighed making his way over to his bed.
He looked at his unmade bed for a moment before sitting down on the floor with his legs stretched out in front of him. Slowly he began to rock back and forth wriggling his fingers with his eyes seemingly going blank and out of focus. I had seen him twirling his fingers before, but it was kind of sad seeing the light in his eyes dim and fade away like there was nothing left of the Jamie I had just witnessed.
Even while he was sitting down on the floor I could make out the boy's hard erection making me wonder why I had never noticed his boy bulge until today. Thinking back on it though, I began to realize that on the previous days since I've shown up Jamie had been wearing different oversized flannel shirts which had hung down to mid-thigh effectively concealing his boyhood. With the pullover shirt he was currently wearing it only dangled down just below his waist and barely over the front of his groin. Now in his sitting position it had pulled up leaving his crotch area exposed.
From the corner of my eye I caught a glimpse of movement that grabbed my attention. It was Boxey on his stomach crawling towards the eleven year old boy. He moved forwards cautiously before stopping several paces away from the boy settling his head on his front paws. He gazed intently at the younger boy his ears twitching around alertly watching Jamie rocking back and forth twirling around his fingers in front of his face. After a short pause Boxey crawled forward a little closer to the boy before settling down again. The big seventy five pound Labrador Boxer mix tended to be a leaner, and it worried me how he might overdo things with Jamie just due to his big size. I thought about calling the dog over not wanting to take the chance of him getting the boy all upset, but something about the way Boxey behaved had me thinking this sort of thing's been going on already the last couple of days.
Up to this point I haven't managed to wake up this early so have never seen Jamie's morning ritual. I suppose the stress a few days ago along with putting in a good days work on the farm simply had me all worn out. By the time I woke up the boy was already dressed sitting on the edge of the bed or floor waiting patiently. However, I also noticed that Boxey always seemed curled up only a foot or two away from Jamie's feet. I never really thought about it much before, thinking the two of them were simply tolerating each other, but now there seemed to be a lot more going on.
Boxey moved forward again this time stopping with his nose about an inch away from the long haired boy's thigh. The kid seemed to pause for a moment before continuing twirling his fingers while the Lab scrutinized the boy his eyebrows and ears twitching in tandem. Time seemed to stretch on for a long time, and I realized I had been holding my breath with anticipation of what was going to happen next. I forced myself to breath continuing to watch silently while curled up under my thick warm blanket which seemed to keep me toasty despite my tendencies to get cold at night. I still had a raging hard-on, and I noticed Jamie was still hard as a rock as well making me chuckle silently. I was careful to hold it in because I didn't want to break the mood.
Boxey finally seems to make his move, and I watched the dog inch forward slowly still on his stomach leaning in with his large head nudging his nose in Jamie's lap. The boy reacted with a soft whine while at the same time shoving at the dog's big head. Jamie tried to shy away, but with his back up against the bed there was nowhere to go as I begin to watch the gentle interaction between boy and dog. It was obvious that the eleven year old autistic boy is perplexed by this gentle beast really wanting no part of it, but the dog was tolerantly persistent simply settling back down next to the boy his nose a mere two inches away from his lap. Once more Boxey begins to watch the boy patiently. Jamie pauses for several seconds before once more beginning to rock back and forth focusing on his wriggling fingers. A minute or two passes before Boxey starts to crawl cautiously forward once more before placing his head in Jamie's lap. The boy makes a whining noise clearly a bit agitated.
"Nnnnnhhhh," Jamie moaned softly in a boyish kind of nasally tone pushing away Boxey's head.
The dog simply accepts the rebuff backing away a little still on his stomach. Seeing Boxey trying to scoot backwards on his haunches was a bit comical as I tried to stifle my giggle. There was something to be learned from this exchange. The biggest lesson was that when dealing with Jamie one had to have infinite patience while also being persistent. I'm sure even the simple act of touching Jamie with his nose would normally have the younger boy throwing some sort of fit, yet Boxey seemed to have the key to success. The approach had to be gentle, and done in a slow cautious way, while at the same time being persistent constantly pushing the boundary against the younger boy. The fact that Boxey had figured out the key made me proud of him. It was something I now planned on using from here on out, that is once I figured out something I can do which might be beneficial for Jamie.
In the span of five minutes Boxey continued this approach each time being rebuffed by Jamie. I began to wonder how many times over the course of the last couple of days the dog had attempted to gain the boy's affection. It didn't seem to matter to the dog so I simply shrugged it off hoping for Boxey's success.
Just when I was hoping for the best it all of a sudden seemed to happen. Boxey crept forward placing his head softly in the boy's lap. Jamie paused for a moment with his rocking motion his hands suspended in mid air and his fingers having stopped wriggling around. Boxey held perfectly still the only movement discernable being his eyebrows and ears twitching around gathering up any information his senses could detect.
To my utter surprise Jamie lowered his hand and scratched Boxey behind his ears. The dog naturally huffed moaning with pleasure at the gentle contact he was receiving from the boy. Boxey held perfectly still for several moments allowing the boy to scratch his ears before lifting up his head and becoming a typical dog by shoving his snout right into Jamie's crotch taking a good sniff. I could see the hard outline of Jamie's erection literally twitch at the tickling sensation of the dog's nose. In a way it made me jealous wishing it was my nose doing that to Jamie, but then it simply became too hilarious, because let's face it that's too funny, well at least when it's someone else and not you.
Of course Jamie immediately jerked in response like any typical boy would when a nose is suddenly shoved into their groin. The boy instinctively shoved the dog's big head off of his crotch with Boxey simply taking it in stride having gotten used to me doing the same thing when he tried to the same thing in my sensitive area. He shifted his attention, and now shoved his snout in the side of Jamie's face licking the boy's ear. Jamie seemed completely at a loss until he felt the damp nose along the side of his neck and the wet lip licking on his earlobe.
For a moment I thought the boy was going to have a fit, and I tensed up getting ready to call off Boxey, but then the most wonderful thing happened that I've ever witnessed. The boy began to giggle gently shoving at the dog's head. The sound of the boy laughing was delightfully musical. It was the pure resonance of innocence like when a baby giggles. The clear wholesome notes of laughter could only be rivaled by an angel.
Laughing was a normal reaction because I did the exact same thing when Boxey poked his nose in my face. It was simply too ticklish to do otherwise. The Lab was just as big and strong as Jamie so he managed to push back for a few brief moments giving the boy a good thank you lick before backing down and settling his nose back in the boy's lap.
"Good doggie." Jamie complimented Boxey scratching the dog behind the ears settling down including that twitching hard twig between his legs that seemed to draw my attention.
Just then I heard a slight noise coming from the stairs catching my attention. Mr. Weiler was standing on the steps rooted in place in utter shock and awe. He glances towards me with a questioning look on his face with me shrugging my shoulders indicating I couldn't explain it either. For a brief moment I wondered if he had caught the part where Boxey had shoved his nose in Jamie's crotch wondering what he thought about the boy's obvious erection.
Jamie paused for a moment not looking towards his uncle, but I got the distinct impression he knew the man was there. Normally he would simply get up and follow his uncle downstairs. Now he seemed conflicted as if deciding what to do. It was almost like he didn't want to get up and leave the dog behind. Finally, he seemed to come to a decision patting the dog on the top of his head.
"Good doggie…got to go." He stated simply crawling back up to his feet making me smile proudly at both the boy and dog.
Even Mr. Weiler seemed pleased. From his reaction to Jamie talking I suppose he already knew the boy was capable of this, but I suppose it was the interaction between the boy and dog that had surprised him. The fact that Jamie had allowed the dog to touch him came off as being a pretty big milestone in Mr. Weiler's eyes. The man glanced my way indicating he wanted to talk with me later. The look was one that came off as a mixed bag. On the one hand I got the distinct feeling he had wanted to talk to me regarding a different more serious matter while also now wanting to talk to me about what had just happened here between Boxey and Jamie.
Watching Jamie making his way towards his uncle I noticed the obvious bulge in Jamie's pants from his erection. Mr. Weiler had to know about it too, but the man simply seemed to ignore it making me wonder if this was a normal occurrence for the boy, and if so why they wouldn't try encouraging him to be a bit more discreet about it.
Once the two of them disappeared downstairs, I hopped out of bed my fingers clamped down around the tip of my blood engorged penis, and into the bathroom closing and locking the door behind me. My erection was literally throbbing painfully, and I could actually feel the blood pumping through my grossly bloated grizzle. I had to take a piss like there was no tomorrow, and all of this hyper stimulating event so early in the morning had me literally bursting at the seams aching for some sort of release. The smooth membrane on my hard boy penis was literally stretched out so tautly around my shaft that it almost felt like it wanted to rip apart at the seam, only it didn't know where it was located. It kind of felt like a stinging sensation all up and down the length of my tubular rigidness.
Tucking my pajamas bottoms under my soft boy pouch, which had constricted up tightly against my body because of the aching sensation, I tried to angle my rigid penis downwards towards the toilet bowl. I gasped and winced from the pain of trying to force it into such an obnoxious angle. Of course I've done this just about every morning since I can remember without any problems, but today it simply hurt too much for me to bend it in this fashion so I could take a piss. Normally, once I let loose my erection deflated, but this morning not a single drop escaped my pee slit. I began to panic because this has never happened before, and I didn't know if my penis was broken or what. Hell, can a penis even break, I thought to myself. It's not like a real bone or anything. Sure people use the word "bone" to describe a hard penis or whatever, but it isn't an actual one or anything so how could it break. Then again, maybe something was wrong with my equipment. Lot's of things can happen internally. This thought made me panic even more as I scrunched up my face biting my upper lip in thought.
Slipping over to the counter I looked at my hard erection and tightly packed satchel noticing how my penis was almost purplish in color. I've seen the tip of my knob turn this sort of crimson color when I was going at myself pretty hard, but never my entire shaft. It was almost like I had rubbed myself raw somehow. The edge of the low counter pressed up against my thigh just below my boy package so I was able to get a clear unobstructed view of myself wincing a little when I ran my fingers over my sensitive giggle stick and joy knob.
Just then it strikes me that my nozzle seems a tad bigger than Jamie's even though his penis was a bit larger than mine. The shape of my glans was both curved and pointed while also being about as wide as my shaft. Jamie's little projectile had a more pointed yet still rounded shape, but not as wide as his shaft. The head shape on mine was wider at the base than the tip; whereas, Jamie's had looked like it's been stretched resembling the shape of a small sleek bullet tip. Looking at the underside of my glans I noticed that both of our knobs underneath had the same smooth curved rounded look. I suppose the bottom line was that Jamie's glans looked a bit on the small side on his large shaft; whereas, mine looked a bit on the large side for the size of my pole.
Just focusing on the tip of Jamie's penis had me all worked up and bothered so I slowly begin to work my little boy piston. I knew it wouldn't be long before I blew my nut since I was all worked up so my only concern was what would happen when I finally climaxed. I had to take a piss so badly that I wondered if I wouldn't spray pee all over the place. I shoved that thought out of my mind because at the moment I was too desperate to worry about it. I could feel my testicles already beginning to bunch up while the familiar tingling sensations began to bubble up inside of me.
Closing my eyes the vision of Jamie's beautiful naked body and extremely hard erection popped into my mind. As I thought about it I had in all actuality only seen his hard shaft and boy pouch briefly before he had tucked himself away, but it was like it had taken a lifetime. I could still make out the pale brownish pink coloration of his rigid spike along with those fine bluish veins spread around his bare pubic mound disappearing in the rippling of his stomach muscles. Even the tightly packed smooth surface of his egg sized satchel didn't go unheeded from my keen scrutiny. It was sort of light brown in coloration with the same type of pale blue veins creating an indecipherable pattern just below the surface like the ones on his bare pubic mound and thick smooth pickle.
It's the large hard shaft on the sleek pale figure of a boy that draws my attention now. It is simply divine in its creation pointing straight up with a slight upwards curve allowing the tip of his small nozzle to brush up lightly against the lower part of his smooth belly.
"Uuuumph, aaaargh, uuuumph, uuumph, uuumph," I groan when the power of my abrupt orgasm slams into me almost knocking me off my feet before it starts to burn throughout my insides beginning at the root of my testicles radiating outwards. The fiery sensation literally rips though my insides, and even the tips of my fingers tingle from the forcefulness of the moment. Recently I've had the most intense orgasm of my life when I thought about that cute blond boy, but even that paled in comparison to the sheer potent dynamism that seared my entire insides leaving behind a smoldering empty husk while my mind reeled and spun out of control.
My heart pounded in my chest and for a moment I felt like I was suspended in the air with no resistance holding me firmly planted on the ground. It was almost like floating in the emptiness of time and space. Then everything seemed to come crashing down around me when I felt my body jolt and shudder with a stinging pain like I had been struck. All of a sudden my chest heaved and I sucked in air trying to fill up my lungs since the oxygen supply had been depleted dangerously low. My head was spinning while I gasped for air feeling completely limp.
Slowly I opened up my eyes looking around allowing them to come back into focus. I was sitting on the bathroom floor with my back slumped up against the wall. At some point I had collapsed making sense now for the feeling of weightlessness I had experienced. There was a numbing sensation on the bottom of my butt while my body felt a bit tweaked. I suppose I must have fallen on my ass rattling my body accounting for that stinging sensation like I had been struck.
"Damn," I croaked out hoarsely pulling myself up noticing the disheveled look on my features.
I hear a shout from somewhere downstairs and suddenly realize they must have heard me falling on to the floor. I imagine it must have been a fairly loud thumping noise when I hear someone calling out my name once more. Reaching over I open up my door a crack and look out not seeing anyone, but once more hearing Mr. Weiler shouting up from the base of the steps asking if everything was alright.
"Um, yeah Mr. Weiler I'm fine. Sorry about that, but I…um…just accidentally banged into the wall by mistake." I replied cringing at the lame excuse because how does someone simply walk into a wall.
It seemed to work though because he shouted back for me to be more careful since everything is still new for me. Closing and locking the door behind me I look in the mirror realizing I still had that sort of dazed look, but at least my erection had gone away. My penis looked a bit beaten up, but that orgasm had been a very extreme one. I suppose not having taken care of my pre-teen needs for several days now had set me up for this massive explosion, not to mention seeing Jamie's sexy fine naked body, my first naked boy ever, or anyone for that matter. That sexy hard penis of his turned me on to no end, which was reflected in my response to the sexual stimulation of his naked vision.
Exhaling loudly, I did notice though that I still didn't squirt despite the power of my orgasmic explosion. It really was beginning to make me fret that there was something wrong with my equipment. Well at least I didn't pee all over the place, which only reminded me that I still had to take a piss in the worst way. Stepping over to the toilet bowl I gave up my offering to the porcelain god. If my gift didn't please him nothing ever would because I swear I must have emptied out Lake Superior to the gods and goddesses of the porcelain bowl. It took forever before I finished up, but I finally managed to squeeze out the final drops shuddering and sighing in relief.
My insides felt a bit raw like I had somehow cleansed myself with fire. Washing my hands and then my face I finish up with my teeth before walking out of the bathroom on wobbly legs taking a seat on the edge of the bed trying to make sense of the most recent events. The situation with Jamie was confusing to say the least. I pondered the emotions I was having towards him. Slowly I sifted through everything that's happened over the last several days trying to make sense of things. The more I tried to put things into some sort of context the more I became perplexed. I was only twelve years old, but was having to deal with some complex issues, one of them not in the least concerning my sexual urges. In the end I simply tried to accept the idea that I had feeling for boys in general and specifically for Jamie in particular. What exactly this meant I wasn't sure right now, but since I was going to be around for only a short while I simply left it for the moment.
The dog brought me back to the moment when he put his head in my lap looking for some attention. "Geeze Boxey, a guy would think you were quiet pleased with yourself convincing Jamie to lavish some love your way. Sometimes I wonder if that's all you want from all of us. As if we aren't spoiling you enough already." I tease him light heartedly running my fingers down his spine hearing that familiar huffing noise he always makes when he is enjoying himself.
There's some noise going on downstairs that draws Boxey's attention so he gets up hurrying down. "What's with the dog?" I hear Aunt Harriet asking.
"I'm not sure. It looks like he wants out." Mr. Weiler replies with a short pause following his comment before I hear first the latch on the door and then the creaking noise from the screen door opening.
"Hmmm, looks like he's walking Jamie out to the bus stop." Mr. Weiler chuckles. "In a way I'm kind of glad since it's a bit of a walk alone all the way out to the main street from here. I'm always worried about Jamie walking on his own." I hear him sigh noting the concern in his voice for the first time with Jamie doing something on his own.
"Are you sure we should let the dog out like that, what if he doesn't come back?" Mrs. Weiler asks a bit concerned now for Boxey as well, which kind of surprises me since I didn't take her for a dog person.
"Don't worry I'm sure he will be back. That's one smart cookie and he won't go too far. Besides, Jamie's taken a liking to the dog. Damn, I still can't believe the dog actually got him to respond like that, and you wanted to put the poor animal out in the barn." Uncle Walt teased while Aunt Harriet seemed to huff at him.
"Well, he is an animal, but I do have to grant you he's at least a clean one. I swear if I didn't know any better I'd say he was a cat. That dog cleans himself more than any dog I've ever seen. I'm surprised he doesn't cough up any hairballs." Aunt Harriet chuckled making me smile.
Looking over at the clock I recognize it's been a good twenty or twenty five minutes since Uncle Walt and Jamie headed downstairs. It made me realize I had been sitting there in deep thought for quiet a while. Strange how sometimes your mind can take you through a lifetime of events in a mere second or two while at other times taking it's sweet time making you loose track of all time. I could smell breakfast already cooking downstairs with my stomach growling in protest.
Making my way down the deep stairs I was actually in a decent mood and feeling somehow much better for a change. Finally getting a chance to jack off seemed to help relieve a lot of my stress. Jamie of course was already gone with Boxey walking down the long drive to the main roadway where he would catch the bus to school. I'm pretty sure this was the last day for him with school being out until after New Year's. I wasn't as concerned about Boxey like Aunt Harriet knowing full well he'd be trotting back soon enough. He's walked me over to my school bus stop plenty of times finding his way back home just fine. Mr. Weiler was correct with his assessment of Boxey. That really was one smart dog.
Sitting down at the table I sighed looking around at the options sitting on the table. Perhaps it was time I talked with Aunt Harriet about our meals, and I was about to say something when Uncle Walt cleared his throat catching my attention.
"Sam, you know that I…um…that is to say Harriet and I love having you here with us, but we think it is time to set down some ground rules." Mr. Weiler stated sort of catching me by surprise despite the warning glance he had given me upstairs earlier.
"Oh…um…alright." I responded not too concerned seeing their point. After all I really haven't been the most gracious guest of late, but I also wanted things to change.
"Anyway, we understand your frustrations Sam, but we have to try getting beyond it." Mr. Weiler began before Aunt Harriet jumped in.
"Yes, we are a little worried because there's Jamie to consider." She added trying to formulate her thoughts.
"I mean, we don't think you would hurt him or anything, not physically, it's just that…well to be honest it's not only about how you act around him being so…so distant and gruff, but also your…um…well language." She pointed out while I furled my eyebrows.
Thinking about it I suppose she wasn't all that far off regarding my language and attitude. In my neck of the woods cussing sort of came with the territory, but until recently I had always been careful with my language around adults. Admittedly, lately though I've let my potty mouth go wild and it even had my parents a bit worried. I had to confess that I was surprised my parents hadn't said anything about my cussing during our recent blowup the other day, but I suppose they were worried about other things at the time.
"For example, this morning." Mrs. Weiler pointed out getting a blank stare from me because I really didn't know what she was talking about since I just now walked in.
"You know…the 'S' word you used earlier this morning while Jamie was getting up." She pointed out making me blush at first because just the idea of her knowing about Jamie being naked first thing in the morning was a bit unsettling.
Let's face it the kid getting up with a full blown erection rubbing himself and all like that had to be awkward. Her knowing about such things even embarrassed me for a moment until something else popped into my mind.
"What…how did you…I mean…are you spying on me?" I asked her my anger beginning to bubble up once more.
It was surprising how quickly my mood had shifted. I really had been in a very good mood wanting things to change, but this was somehow a bit troubling to me. I mean, how could she know what happened this morning. I'm positive everyone was still in bed so how could she have heard me earlier this morning when I realized Jamie was actually a boy instead of a girl. I mean, the whole "OH SHIT" statement had just naturally tumbled out of my mouth. It had sounded loud breaking the silence so early in the morning, but it still shouldn't have carried all the way to their bedroom, at least not in a decipherable manner since I was upstairs and practically all the way on the other side of the house. That much I was positive about. Besides I knew they kept their bedroom door shut at night. Sure I shouldn't be cussing like that, and it is one thing to be called on it while adults are around, but to have to watch what I say and do every waking minute even when I thought I was alone was somehow…well…wrong. I mean what adolescent kid doesn't want or need privacy.
Hell, now I began to panic wondering if she somehow knew about the naughty I just did in the bathroom. This thought more than anything else sent a flood of conflicting emotions through my insides. On the one hand I was mortified; on the other hand I was royally pissed off feeling somehow violated; not only mentally but also in regards to trust. I mean there are simply some boundaries that should never be crossed, and it made me wonder how I could trust someone that goes around spying on me. Then there was the issue of my little visit to Jamie's bedside last night where I apologized. That was something I felt had been a private matter between me and him.
"Sam, it's not like that." Mr. Weiler interjected giving his wife a scowling look while she seemed to gaze back at him as if to ask 'what.'
"Listen Sam, we have a baby monitor next to Jamie's bed." He began trying to explain.
"You what!" I gasped in surprise and a bit more than horrified.
It all sort of made sense to me now. I recalled seeing a little electronic device next to Jamie's bed by the wall. I never thought anything of it figuring it to be a radio or something that they used so he could listen to some music. Now though I suppose every night when Mrs. Weiler went upstairs to retrieve Jamie's wet clothes she probably turned it on for the evening. Then in the morning when she went up to make his bed she probably turned it off. At least I hoped she turned it off, but still, it felt a bit creepy knowing that it was on all night long. What if I talked in my sleep or something, confessing something revealing, or worse, what if I had woken up and had decided to jack off. Not that it had happened, but still, it could have and it was humiliating just thinking about the possibility of it.
"That's…um…that's just too creepy." I managed to get it out of my craw, almost choking on it, my cheeks burning with a combination of bewilderment, embarrassment, and anger at the idea of being spied on in this manner.
"Sam, it's not what you think. We weren't spying on you or anything. We do it because we need to watch over Jamie in case something happens in the middle of the night."
It didn't make sense to me. I mean the kid was eleven years old after all. Sure he was autistic and all, but there wasn't any indication to me that he did things in the middle of the night to warrant such drastic actions as spying.
"NO…," I shook my head in disbelief the anger obvious in my voice. "You've got to take it out. He's like eleven. No kid that age…no matter what…likes to be spied on like this. He's got to know it's there. I mean he isn't stupid or anything…just different. That's…um…that's just too creepy." I repeated trying to reign in my foul language barely succeeding because the rage roiled deep down inside of me waiting to explode at any moment.
"You've got to get rid of it." I made it more of a command rather than a request.
This had now turned into a heated discussion, but as of yet still not a shouting match when Harriet spoke up a little turned off by my tone of voice. "Now see here young man. This is our home and you are our responsibility just like Jamie so we will do what we see fit, and as long as you are staying under our roof you will do as you are told. If you don't like it you can leave." She harrumphed crossing her arms defiantly at me before the features on her face suddenly shifted like she was now regretting her comments, but knowing it was too late to take them back.
"Harriet!" Mr. Weiler immediately spoke up a bit shocked while I got up backing up shaking my head commenting at the same time Uncle Walt was raising his objections.
"This whole family is just way too creepy!" I literally shouted back at her catching both of them by surprise at my sudden movement and verbal outburst.
"No wonder Jamie is acting the way he is. No eleven year old kid deserves to be constantly monitored without any privacy. Are you guys all nuts." I finished off rushing out of the room heading for the stairs leading to the room I shared with Jamie before I said something truly nasty.
"Sam…wait!" I heard Uncle Walt shouting after me. "It's not like that…Harriet didn't mean it the way it came off." He tried to explain, but at this point it was simply too much for me.
This whole past week had me so upset and bewildered. I've never felt so humiliated, abandoned, and worthless like I've felt this entire week. It wasn't fair. I didn't do anything to deserve any of this. No one seemed to understand, and no one even wanted to listen to me. It was so unfair.
"No! Leave me alone…all of you. I hate you all…and you can all just go to hell. No one understands anything and it's so unfair. Just leave me alone." I shouted the voice catching in my voice as I began to hiccup trying to hold back my tears barely succeeding because of how hurt and betrayed I felt at this very moment.
Leaving the two of them standing downstairs and gawking I ran up the stairs and into the room looking around. I can't take it any longer I thought to myself making my way to the bed on the far side of the room setting my two small cases on the top of the soft mattress. Looking around in a daze I automatically began shoving stuff back into my bags.
"Harriet what were you thinking?" I heard Walt ask his wife and even though I couldn't hear it I knew there was a sigh to go along with the question.
"I know…I know…and I'm sorry I blew up like that Walt. It's just that kid has a way…," I heard her pause with exasperation.
"Yes, I understand Harriet, but just look at it for a moment from his perspective. I mean, he's got to feel so…so awful right now with how things ended at home for him. I can't imagine my own father making me spend Christmas literally with strangers." He commented.
"Oh don't be so dramatic, we aren't strangers Walt." Harriet corrected him.
"I know we aren't Harriet. We practically raised his mother, but still we might as well be. I mean we've seen him for all of what…a handful of times, and the last time was what…four or five years ago."
"Of course you're right sweetie, but we do have to think about Jamie…don't we?"
"Yes, but do we really need that baby monitor Harriet. I mean maybe Sam has a point." Mr. Weiler interjected while I shut my suit cases making sure I had everything.
There really wasn't all that much and it was all in one place so it had taken me all of five minutes to finish with me picking up my two cases making my way back towards the steps. The bags were a bit heavy so they bumped up against the narrow walls and stairs as I stomped down to the main floor. The Weilers could hear the noise and came looking to see what I was up to. Just when I got to the main floor I could see the shocked look on the Weilers' faces.
"What on earth…um…Sam what do you think you are doing?" Uncle Walt frowned trying to remain calm, but also obviously alarmed by the situation.
"Well, I don't like your rules…and like Aunt Harriet said, if I don't like them I can leave, so I'm leaving." I stated starting for the door with Mr. Weiler shifting in front of me blocking my way.
"Sam…you can't leave…I mean…where would you go?" He tried to reason with me.
"Just wherever people won't try to spy on me like the NSA does, or other countries like in Russia." I shouted getting frustrated with the corners of my eyes welling up as I once more stepped towards the door trying to shove my way past Mr. Weiler.
"Stop it Sam." Uncle Walt stated forcefully grabbing on to one of my suitcases while also trying to grab a hold of me with his other hand.
He lunged for me and I panicked literally hitting him with the bag he wasn't hanging on to. Mr. Weiler wasn't expecting me to swing the case at him so it hit the large man in the shoulder knocking him off balance. He tried to stop himself from falling by grabbing on to the second suitcase, but he was too heavy for me to hang on to so he ended up ripping it out of my hands while his weight dragged him down on to the floor. It stunned me for a moment with me watching him land on his side. Mrs. Weiler gasped and leaned over to help her husband with me looking on in horror because I had never intended for things to go this far.
"Walt are you alright?" Aunt Harriet gasped helping to right her husband so he was sitting on the floor while he tested his arm.
"I'm fine Harriet…no real harm done." He stated.
"I…um…I…I'm so sorry…I didn't…," was all I managed to get out before I began to cry with my shoulders quivering uncontrollably.
It was so humiliating standing there crying like a five year old so I simply bolted for the door.
"Sam…wait!" I heard Aunt Harriet shout after me.
It wasn't an angry shout or anything, simply a pleading one. Rushing towards the door I heard Uncle Walt tell his wife to leave me be for now. Shoving open the door, the cold air bit into my skin. I had shoved on my jacket before heading down the stairs, but it was still a shock to me as I looked around. I had nowhere to go, and we were literally out in the middle of nowhere, early in the morning, with a stinging cold wind cutting through my very warm jacket. The dark outline of the barn loomed ahead so I made my way over to it since the structure was the only other shelter around besides the house. Just then Boxey came trotting up to me sensing my worry fretting a little himself now.
Stepping across the threshold of the barn with Boxey following close behind it felt a bit warmer inside. It was still a bit chilly, but at least the wind didn't find a way to cut to my bone. It was dark inside the large open space with me looking around for a place where I could think. There was a ladder leading up to another floor so I made my way over to it. I've noticed it before, but haven't bothered going up to see what was on the next level of the barn.
It was a steep ladder, but I managed to open the trap door and pull myself up. Looking back down I noticed Boxey staring up at me longing to join me, but since he couldn't he simply curled up lying down by the foot of the stairs to wait for me to come back down. He really was a good dog.
It wasn't all that dark up here so I looked around noticing stacks of hay bails taking up most of the space. Making my way over to the far end I found a natural type of seat made out of hay stacks so I plopped myself down. It didn't feel so cold up here surrounded by all the hay as I sucked in a deep quivering breathe trying to calm down. My heart was pounding in my chest, and I was still softly crying to myself. Beneath the surface of my roiling anger there was a melancholy mood setting in with the reality of the situation finally starting to sink in.
Noticing the large shuttered opening along the wall in front of my seat I lifted out the timbered bar from its socket allowing the wooden panels to swing open outwards. The breath caught in my chest when my gaze fell upon a large expanse of orchard trees way off into the distance. The clouds were beginning to dissipate with the sun making a rare show of force for this time of year. Even though there weren't any leaves on the trees it was still a fantastic view making me wonder what it would look like up here in spring, summer, and even fall when the leaves would turn color.
I'm not sure how long I sat there alone, but it seemed like it had been a while when I was rousted out of my deep preoccupied thoughts. "I see you've found my spot." Uncle Weiler's gentle voice drifted over the rafters waking me up from my almost meditative state as I turned my head looking towards the large imposing figure standing in the shadows.
Sighing I turned back towards the nice view enjoying how it made me feel so calm and insignificant in the grand scheme of things with Mr. Weiler continuing to talk. "I used to come up here often when I needed a place to think or simply unwind. It's been a while though, and I suppose perhaps it's because lately I've been preoccupied with other things in life." The man sighed taking a seat next to me holding out a plate of warm food.
"Thanks Uncle Walt." I exhaled taking the plate from him and setting it off to the side making him frown questioningly. "I'm sorry about…earlier." I apologized choking back a sob that threatened to escape.
Mr. Weiler looked at me and shook his head giving me a small grin. "It's alright Sam. No harm no foul." He finished off ruffling my hair. "You're folks did warn me that you've become quite the scrapper, so I suppose in a way I'm at fault too." He offered up this time making me frown.
"Your fault?" I inquired with him nodded.
"Sure, I had no business grabbing at you like that. You only did what was natural and protected yourself." He offered up trying to make peace with me.
"Thanks…but still Uncle Walt I shouldn't have acted the way I did. You and Aunt Harriet have been very kind all things considering." I offered up while he simply shrugged it off.
"Sam…truly…Harriet and I are happy to have you here for Christmas, but we are a bit concerned; especially Harriet." Uncle Walt offered up.
"Yeah…I suppose she has a right to be a bit alarmed. I haven't actually been all that cool with Jamie." I exhaled shaking my head.
"Yes, she's worried about Jamie, but she's also worried about you."
"What…me…why would she be so bothered about me?" I asked a bit surprised.
"Well for one thing you've hardly eaten anything since you've arrived." He pointed out while I hung down my head knowing he was right.
When I didn't say anything he probed a little more in that unobtrusive kind of way. "I mean I've always enjoyed her cooking. Of course I'm no food expert, but no one's ever complained about Harriet's cooking…well…let's just say no one that's survived." He offered up chuckling trying to lighten up the mood making me smile in the process.
"No…I suppose it is just fine." I offered up becoming silent again looking out the open window enjoying the warmth of the sun shining through the opening.
"So?" He asked nodding his head towards the plate and then sighed when I didn't pick it up. "Sam…what's really going on?" He wondered with me simply hanging my head and rolling my shoulders.
"I can't eat most of this stuff Uncle Walt." I admitted to him.
"What…I mean you don't like it because you are a vegetarian or something?" He implied while I chuckled at him shaking my head no.
"Then what…I don't understand." He admitted a bit concerned now.
"I've got to be careful with what I eat is all."
"I don't understand Sam…are you like on a diet or something. No one's said you are diabetic or anything…so." He paused a moment before adding. "I mean it's not like you are fat or anything. Heck, for that matter you could probably do with eating a little more." He admitted to me making me smile.
"No…not a diabetic…not a diet…well…not like what you are thinking. It's just that there are some things that make me sick is all."
"Sick…your dad didn't say anything about you being allergic or getting sick or anything with certain foods." Mr. Weiler stated a bit put off by my dad not informing him of something like this.
"That's because he doesn't believe what the doctors say about it." I admitted sadly because my own father didn't believe me or the doctors that I got sick when I ate certain kinds of foods.
"What…Sam…I'm confused here. I mean I still don't understand what you are getting at, and why on earth wouldn't your dad believe you or the doctors if something makes you sick?" He sighed shaking his head in exasperation while I sat there for a moment trying to find a way to explain it all to him.
"Uncle Walt, remember how I used to get sick all the time when I was little?" I began noticing him scrunch up his eyebrows in thought before nodding his head.
"Yeah, and then it just seems like all of a sudden you grew out of that phase when you were like eight years old or so." He responded recalling those awful times when I was little getting sick right out of the blue for no reason what so ever.
"Well, that's not exactly true…I mean I didn't really grow out of it." I replied while he shifted his weight getting more comfortable nodding for me to go on.
"Mom knew something wasn't right so kept taking me to all sorts of different doctors who couldn't find anything wrong. Then she started noticing how certain meals would set me off at times so decided to take me to a specialist with food allergies. Well evidently I'm not necessarily allergic to certain foods, but we found out that my body has an intolerance to certain things. You see there are certain kinds of food items like gluten, dairy, eggs, and a few others that in general many peoples' systems have intolerances to, but they don't really realize it because their bodies adjust and absorb most of it only having side affects that are kind of minor and hardly noticeable. Well with me I tend not to handle those things very well at all, and I get pretty sick at times." I tried to explain to Uncle Walt while he nodded his head looking a bit sad about me not being able to eat making me chuckle.
"Don't look like that Uncle Walt. It's not all that bad, I can still eat stuff. It's just I have to find substitutes is all. I mean it isn't too easy to do that sometimes, and of course a lot of goodies that most people eat can't be substituted, but still it isn't all too bad. For instance instead of dairy milk I drink coconut or almond milk. Then there are things like eggs. I can still eat eggs, but not as often and only if it is from chickens that are hormone free. A lot of things these days are pumped full of hormones and my joints tend to swell up because of it." I chuckle making Mr. Weiler smile sadly at me nodding his head like he was filing away this information.
"Alright, if that's the case why wouldn't your dad believe you, your mom, or your doctors?" He asked me while I shrugged my shoulders a bit agitated about it as well.
"I mean it isn't like I'm allergic to this stuff, only I can't handle it too well. It's like when I have one of my friends staying over I'll order some Pizza. I can eat a few slices and not feel too bad. I mean later I might feel a little nauseous or something, but it goes away fast enough. I can do that sort of thing every once in a while in a limited way and get away with it, but I can't eat it on a regular basis like most people do. Then when I do cheat like that I have to watch how much at one time. Well, my dad sees this and thinks it is all nonsense and simply in my head. He doesn't get it how bad I feel when I eat that kind of stuff on a regular basis." I explained kind of sad how my own dad didn't even believe me with this simple little issue.
"Ever since I went on this new diet I've never felt better. I don't want to go back to feeling that sick ever again. It's tough sticking to my foods that I can tolerate when I see all my friends eating all this good stuff. Sometimes I'm just dying for a good greasy burger, but I know I'd end up puking all over the place or maybe worse. Don't get me wrong I can eat meat; it's just the hormones and all the other nasty stuff that goes into it. We do eat meat at home, but only organic and grass fed without the hormones and stuff. It's more expensive, and I suppose that is another thing my dad hates about it all. Bison meat is by far my favorite." I offered up chuckling while Mr. Weiler simply nodded his head, but looking a bit put off by what he was hearing regarding my dad.
"Why that son of a…," Uncle Walt gritted his teeth and bit his tongue, but not before I got the impression that he wasn't too happy with my dad.
"He never said anything to us Sam…I promise you that. If he had we would have been more sensitive with fixing stuff you can tolerate. I'm sure your mom would have mentioned something, but it was your dad who made the arrangements for you to stay with us."
"Thanks Uncle Walt. You don't like my dad much, do you?" I observed while he simply looked at me sternly for a few moments before huffing and stroking his chin with his fingers like he was thinking about it.
"Well…Sam I honestly don't hate him or anything. I mean…he wouldn't be my choice for a friend, but then he's also not truly a bad sort either." He replied getting a disgusted huff out of me.
"Sam…don't be too hard on your dad. I know right now you two are having issues…but believe me for the most part your father is a good man." He stated holding up his hand when I was about to protest.
"It's true Sam. No I don't much care for your father as a friend, but yes in general he's a good man and has been good to both you and your mom. Things happen in life at times that are out of our control, but there are always two sides to a story. The man is still your father, and the way I see it for the most part has always tried doing right by you. Yes both your mom and your dad have gone their separate ways, but he is still around and hasn't abandoned you two like many deadbeat fathers. In my book that says something about the man. Hopefully the two of you will be able to mend fences and at least be civilized and respectful towards one another." He stated reaching over to give me a comforting hug.
When he reached over I instinctively flinched immediately feeling guilty about it; especially, when he held out his hands almost apologetically thinking he had stepped over the boundary somehow. I could see how the rebuff seemed to hurt his feeling, and then it dawned on me how tough it must be for both him and Aunt Harriet never being able to hug or receive a hug from Jamie.
"I…I'm sorry Uncle Walt. I didn't mean it that way. It's just…um…it's been so long since I've been hugged. I mean of course mom hugs me all the time…it's just…dad…I mean it's been a long time since dad's…," I got choked up surprising even myself just how much it meant to me not to get hugs from my own father with the waterworks beginning to well up inside of me.
My body began to shudder with emotion when all of a sudden I found myself in Uncle Walt's strong embrace letting the waterworks flow as I began to cry in earnest. I was so angry at my own father, yet I still yearned for him to hold me telling me everything would be just fine like he used to do when I was very little. Now there was this achy empty kind of feeling inside of me because I missed those moments that I had with my dad when I was much younger. Somewhere along the line it was like he had become cold and distant.
Uncle Walt didn't say anything simply letting me get it out of my system while I slowly calmed back down. "It must be really hard for you and Aunt Harriet." I sniffled wiping away the tears with the back of my hand.
"What do you mean?" He asked allowing me to sit back up while I tried to compose myself again.
"You know with Jamie. It must be tough not being able to hug or hold him. That's got to be the worst feeling in the world." I told him speaking a little from experience yearning for the same with my own father, but at least getting plenty of affection from my mom.
"Yeah I suppose, but Sam it's really been the toughest on your aunt." He sighed while I looked at him questioningly.
The man hesitated a moment contemplating whether or not he should tell me something, and then seemed to come to a decision. "You see Sam when our niece first came to stay with us she brought Jamie with her. He was about four and we all knew back then he was different." Uncle Walt took a deep breath exhaling and shaking his head sadly while I did the math real quick.
"So Jamie was with you guys back when we came to visit when I was like eight or so?" I pointed out with him nodding his head. "Why didn't I meet him back then?"
"Well the day you guys came over he was in a special program that he went to back then so wasn't back home at the time, and you were having such a good time that it simply didn't come up. Of course your folks knew about it, but you were still so little and it wasn't something we felt you needed to know at the time."
"Oh…alright. I suppose that makes sense. I mean…it's not like we were around a lot or anything." I responded not feeling offended that I hadn't been told.
"Anyway, when our niece came to stay with us she was having all sorts of issue, and with Jamie it became too much for her. Even your aunt Harriet was having problems with another boy under our roof after all these years." Uncle Walt admitted getting really quiet for a few moments while I tried to digest what he was saying.
"I don't understand Uncle Walt. I mean…do you guys have a son? I mean you said having another boy under your roof after all these years. I thought mom said you didn't have any kids." I told him a bit puzzled wondering if I had missed something now.
"No…no kids Sam…at least not for long time…well what you would consider many years." He stated a bit sadly noticing my confused look. "We had a son in our later years Sam, but we lost him when he was about your age, and it hit Harriet really bad. One winter it got so bad around in these parts that when he got pneumonia we couldn't get him to a hospital because all the roads were closed. The local doctor did what he could, but it was simply too much for our little Trevor, and he slipped away from us. Then when our niece came with Jamie a couple of years later it was just too overwhelming for Harriet. She literally avoided him keeping her distance because it hurt too much." He admitted to me as tears welled up in my eyes feeling so bad for the Weilers.
"I bet you two were great parents." I offered up getting a smile out of the big man.
"Harriet was a great mother despite us being older. She was patient, dotting, always knowing what to say and do, but when Trevor died a big part of her went with him to the grave. It took a long time, and even then it was tough Sam. When our niece came with Jamie it was like Harriet retreated once more."
"But she's not like that now Uncle Walt. I mean…if anything she's overprotective of Jamie." I noted while he nodded in agreement.
"Yes, but only because she was forced into the situation. You see we finally ended up taking Jamie to the main hospital, and they were able to diagnose him with autism. Well our niece took the news pretty hard so one day she simply left without a word leaving Jamie behind with us. We had to make a difficult choice of placing him in the care of the state or taking on the responsibility." Uncle Walt stated shaking his head like the memory of those times were sad ones for him.
"Sam, I have to admit that the strain of such a decision was almost too much for Harriet. She didn't want the responsibility at first, but then something seemed to snap inside of her because she all of a sudden decided we couldn't abandon him. To this day I believe that choice was the best one we've ever made in our entire lives. We took him in even though it was tough going, but we somehow managed."
"I can see how that would have been a tough decision. Taking in someone with Jamie's needs could be a challenge I suppose." I scrunched up my eyes thinking about the last few days and was simply in awe with the sacrifices the Weilers have had to make.
"Yes Sam and it has also created some unique consequences. You see, it didn't take long for Harriet to fall in love with Jamie, and because of what happened with Trevor she started becoming overly protective of the boy. To make matters worse Jamie is the spitting image of our little Trevor. Within a year he will be the same age as our little boy was when he passed away, and I swear Sam…he looks more and more like our son every day. I see it in Harriet's eyes how difficult it is for her not to be able to hug and hold Jamie in her arms. He's so much like Trevor, yet so different too that it has Harriet so turned around at times. So you see…it's tough for her to give in sometimes Sam. Just like this morning with the baby monitor."
"I'm sorry Uncle Walt. I didn't know. It's just when I found out about the baby monitor it was…well kind of creepy…you know? I mean…um…something like that could be embarrassing and all…um…at times." I blushed realizing I had said a bit too much.
Uncle Walt chuckled knowingly reaching over and ruffling my hair. "Yeah I suppose you're right. I was your age once too believe it or not." He added with a wink. "So I understand how important privacy is at this age. I've known for a while now we should stop using the baby monitor. I mean Jamie is getting older too, and like you said he isn't stupid and does sort of know things. I'm sure even though he can't say it for himself he doesn't like it either. I suppose women really don't understand such things." Mr. Weiler sighed rubbing his chin and getting quiet while he thought it over.
"Anyway Sam," Uncle Walt began patting my knee his voice booming in the lulling silence that had ensued making me flinch reflexively.
"I'm sure Aunt Harriet will come around, don't fret it. We'll just go in and the three of us will talk it over. Sam…Harriet really is a pushover once you get to know her. She isn't as stern as she comes across. Of course she's very protective like a mother bear when backed into a corner, but she does understand if given the chance." He nodded standing up motioning for me to pick up the plate of food.
"Let's go inside and get you something you can eat. We will tell her about your diet first. She's going to be pissed off at your father that's for sure, but I'm certain she will whip you up something in short order. Now the general store in town probably won't have what you need so we will have to work something out. Maybe the store in the big town where we go shopping at Fareway and Wal-Mart might have some of what you need, but by the sounds of things we might have to find some other ways to get the rest of the items." He added pausing for a moment by the stairs tugging on his ear like some sort of plan was beginning to form.
"So anyway, I'm thinking tomorrow we will head over to Blue Meadows, and I'll introduce you to Earl. He owns a big rig and has a route where he delivers supplies. He pops into town every Thursday and Monday just to say hey to his brother Henry, the guy you met in the General Store. On occasion he will unofficially drop off specialty items for people in these parts. We can make a grocery list for him, and see if he can pick up any food items you need from Des Moines since he is heading that way tomorrow." Mr. Weiler offered up making plans like everything was already settled motioning for me to follow him back down the steps so we could clear the air with Aunt Harriet.
For the first time in several days I began to feel better about things smiling at Uncle Walt's enthusiasm like everything finally made sense to him. In a way our little chat seemed to have cleared the air for both of us. I finally began to understand where Aunt Harriet was coming from. I still hoped we would be able to get rid of that damn baby monitor, and there were other things I was still confused about. Things like why Jamie always came from his baths completely dressed and sopping wet, why he didn't seem to be bothered by being naked in front of me when getting dressed, why he wasn't bothered by his obvious boners, but I figured I'd be finding out about a lot of things here in short order.
Of course there was no way I was going to ask about some things, like the whole naked and boner stuff, but still maybe asking about other things might lead to answers for some of my other questions. For now, the first order of business for me was to finally get a decent meal under my belt.
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