Sea Change, Chapter 41: After The Ball

By Josh

It was going to be a short swim. At our late breakfast, Becky had announced that the resort was allowing our group a late checkout, and that a short trail ride was available for any who wanted it. When Linda told us that she had to help take down decorations and settle up with the lodge, Dan and I offered to help. But she declined the help, and rather than go on the ride, we headed for the pool.

After testing the water with our feet, Daniel and I stood at the side of the pool trying to decide whether to actually get in. The sky was high and clear; the sun was bright and hot. The air was still, but the water was chilly, and it was pleasant just standing and chatting. Besides, standing around in our brief, brief speedos for all to see was a bit of fun.

Reg showed up at the pool in swim briefs that were almost as brief as ours. "Linda helping with cleanup?" he asked, joining us.

"Yep," Dan answered. "Becky too?"

Reggie nodded. "Is the water cold?"

"Nah," Daniel answered. "The water's perfect. Jump in."

Reggie eyed him suspiciously and then noticed my grin. A smile broke out on his face. "After you."

Someone whistled and we turned to see a line of sorority sisters and their dates, on horseback, filing past on the drive. There were more whistles (from the girls) and waves. One person waving was Spider. I waved back, thinking of the camera he had borrowed, and how Linda had insisted on getting Janet to come into our room that morning to take pictures of Linda, Dan, and I before we were dressed.

Janet seemed to have enjoyed that.

As we watched the riders progress down the drive, the brothers from the night before walked past with their mom. It seemed like less than a minute before the older brother was back - in his swim trunks. He reminded me of a puppy with big hands, feet, and joints that needed to be grown into. A friendly, glasses-wearing puppy.

The kid hovered around behind us. It was a little embarrassing, so I decided it was time to get in to the pool. I shoved Reg in first, and then Dan; bam, bam. They came up in chest-deep water, sputtering. I bent over them from the side of the pool, mocking and prepared to dodge back if they made a move for me.

"Come on in, Sean," Dan said with a wicked glint in his eye. "The water's just fine."

Both their eyes dropped to somewhere behind me. "Do it!" Reg called out. "Now!" Dan said.

I realized someone was behind me and turned quickly, but not quickly enough. The kid pushed me in, but I grabbed him, taking him with me.

He had a hard, boney body that banged against mine as we went under and came back up.
"Yeow!" I cried out.

"Yeow!" the kid echoed.

Reggie and Dan laughed in revenge.

The water was chest deep for me, closer to neck deep for the kid. "Hey!" I said, splashing him in the eyeglasses. "I'll teach you to sneak up on a guy!"

He laughed and shook his thick, wet hair back. Then he took off his eyeglasses, drying his eyes with the back of his hand. He blinked several times. Dan and Reg quieted immediately.

The kid looked entirely different without his glasses. He had high cheekbones, amazingly long, black eyelashes, and large green eyes. And a wonderfully sweet smile.

"You OK?" I asked.

He nodded, setting his glasses on the side of the pool.

"You sure?" I asked.

He nodded again.

"OK, then," I said, and dove under, hoisting him over my shoulder, flipping him over my back.

He came up splashing and caught me right in the face. I splashed back. And when Dan laughed, I splashed him too.

The splashing started as a free-for-all, but the kid made himself my ally and before long, we were a teaming up against Dan and Reggie.

The kid used me as a shield, hanging on to my shoulders from behind while splashing from my side. When he had trouble keeping up, he wrapped his long, thin legs around my waist and held on with an arm across my throat while he rapidly splashed with his free hand.

And he sprung a boner right in the middle of my back. That caused me to spring one too. He felt it with the backs of his heels and the back of his legs as he held on. I ignored both his boner and mine... or I tried to.

"Hey!" the kid said, during a lull in the splashing. "Let's horse fight." He tightened his legs around me.

"Whoa!" Daniel said. "Be careful. Sean has a bad knee."

"I can be your horse," Reggie offered the kid.

"Or I can," Dan said. "You're bigger, Reg. You need to be the horse for Sean."

"Aw," the kid said, sounding disappointed. He tightened his grip around my shoulders and pressed his cheek to the side of my head. He was still hard and I felt it, just above my butt. He brought his heels up and gently backing them against my groin, testing to see whether I was still hard. I was, so I pushed his feet down and away with one hand while clasping his thigh with the other to hold him up.

"What's your name?" I asked.

"Trevor."

"Well, Trevor. Dan there makes a mighty fine stud horse, believe me. And I really did have knee surgery not long ago." I turned my head just enough to whisper. "And don't worry about the woody; he's cool."

Trevor held on.

"Really," I said. "I've got a weak knee."

Reluctantly, Trevor climbed off me. Daniel moved over and offered his back. I climbed up on Reggie's and when he felt my still stiff cock against his butt, he "woo hoo-ed" and pulled my legs tightly around him.

We squared off and Trevor grinned, stretching his arms out toward me. Reg and Dan closed on each other. Trevor and I grabbed each other's shoulders, and he smiled happily into my eyes, just before I pushed him back off Daniel.

When Trevor's mom and little brother, Russell, showed up at the pool, I slipped off Reggie and let Russell take a turn at trying to unseat his brother.

Not long after, Trevor said he needed a rest and came to the side of the pool beside me. "Are you a college student, too?" he asked.

"Yeah. I'm a freshman," I told him. "So is Daniel."

"I'm a freshman, too," he said. "In high school."

"I sorta figured it wasn't college," I said with a grin.

Trevor chuckled and looked up into my eyes. His green eyes dilated and his smile went slack.

"Where are you from?" I asked, looking away.

"San Antonio," he said. "My aunt works up here and gets us into the resort sometimes."

"I go to school in San Antonio," I volunteered. "At Trinity."

"Where is that?"

"Down by the zoo," I said. "Sorta fits."

Trevor smiled lopsidedly, not catching the joke. Then he moved closer so that our shoulders touched. "Are you really gay?" he asked quietly.

I laughed. "Sorta late to be asking that, after rubbing a woody on me."

"Seriously," he said.

"Seriously? Yes. And Daniel's my boyfriend," I quickly pointed out.

Trevor nodded, knowingly. "I'm gay," he said.

"You're a little young to be deciding that already," I said.

"You can decide?" Trevor asked, surprised.

I studied him. The kid was completely without guile. "No," I said. "I guess you can't always decide something like that."

Trevor nodded and looked away. "Nobody knows," he said. "Except you," he added, returning his gaze to me.

Reggie rose up under Russell and hoisted him, hands under his butt, up into the air and tossed him toward Daniel. Russell whooped and Daniel dodged. Then Daniel hoisted Russell, sending him back toward Reggie. Without Reggie's strength, the toss didn't send Russell far.

"We live up by North Star Mall," Trevor said. "I don't think that's far from the zoo."

"Not real far," I agreed.

"Cool," Trevor said and looked at me as if that settled something.

"Of course, they don't let us out much," I told him, pushing off the side. I decided that it was time to rejoin Dan and Reggie.

Trevor followed and hung around as Reggie, Dan, and I told each other about our schools. It wasn't until Trevor's mom called him over to her that we were free to talk.

"Looks like your fan club has another member," Dan said with a grin.

"Yeah, well forget that," I said. "He's just a kid."

Dan smirked and cocked an eyebrow.

"He's got a fan club?" Reggie asked Dan, nodding in my direction.

"Oh yeah, mainly kids and ugly girls," Dan said with a chuckle.

"Well, there was a gorgeous blonde," I said with a frown. "Did he drop out?"

"Nope," Dan said. "Still fan club president."

"I'll join the club," Reggie offered. "Yours too, Dan."

Linda showed up at poolside just then, with her camera. We horsed around while she took several shots.

"You going to get in?" I asked.

Linda shook her head and looked at her watch. "We took too long. Check out time is pretty soon."

"Guess we better get out," I said to Dan.

"I'll get you towels," Linda offered, and headed to a stack beside the entrance to the pool.

"Don't drive out of here before I get your phone numbers and addresses," Reggie said.

Dan and I climbed from the pool and took the towels Linda offered. As we were toweling dry, Trevor and his mom came over. She was one of those short gals who rounded out after a couple of kids. She had a nice smile though; like Trevor's.

"Are you Sean?" She asked.

"Yes, ma'am," I answered.

"May I talk to you a moment?"

A chill ran up my spine. What did Trevor tell her? I glanced nervously at Dan. "Sure," I said, following her as she stepped a few feet away.

Trevor started to follow, but she waved him off. "Just wait, Trevor."

Once we were away from the others, she got to the point. "Trevor says you go to Trinity."

I nodded. "Yes, Ma'am."

She smiled. "Don't call me Ma'am. Just call me Lisa."

"OK, Lisa."

"Look, Sean. Have you ever heard of the Big Brother, Big Sister program?"

I nodded.

"I've talked to the people with the program and I've tried to get Trevor interested in a big brother - his dad passed away six years ago, and we don't have any older male relatives in town. And no older male friends who can be, you know... role models."

I nodded, understanding what she was saying, but with an empty feeling in my gut as I thought I knew the direction she was heading.

"I know we don't know each other," she said, "but you seem like a nice young man, and Trevor has taken an instant liking to you." She looked pleadingly into my eyes. "Until today, Trevor has had zero interest in having a big brother. But a moment ago, he was begging me to ask you to consider being a big brother for him."

"But I don't even know you, guys," I stammered. "You don't know me."

She nodded. "I know. And you wouldn't have to decide right away. Just come over for supper sometime. Let us get to know you."

"I'm pretty busy in school right now," I said, spreading my hands apologetically.

She nodded, but there was sadness in her eyes. She knew I was putting her off. She looked a little helpless; a little hopeless. And I felt like a Grade A asshole. "When would you like me to come for supper?" I asked.

She smiled. "You don't have to."

"No, I'll be glad to," I said. "Thursday night might be good for me."

She smiled and patted my forearm. "Let me copy down your phone number and address."

. . . . .

Since Linda had ridden down to the resort with Janet, Dan and I took her back to San Marcos with us; sitting in Dan's lap most of the way. We stopped for a mid-afternoon lunch at a Mexican restaurant close to her campus and a quick meal turned into a two-hour conversation.

At her sorority house, we carried her things to her room. Daniel kissed her goodbye first. It was a lover's kiss; a long, lingering of mingled bodies, breath, and tender lips.

Linda held out her arm and pulled me into their embrace. We kissed and she hugged my neck, hard. "Thank you," she whispered. "Thank you both. You guys made this weekend better than I ever dreamed it could be!"

. . . . .

McKinney Falls State Park is only a couple of miles from here," Dan offered as I pulled the Bronco onto I-35 North.

"We wouldn't have much time," I pointed out.

"So?" he asked. "You have a park pass. It's not like it'd cost anything." He leaned across and rubbed inside my leg. "We need to."

I knew what he meant. We'd had a weekend of sex with Linda, but now we needed it to be just us, for at least a few moments before we had to part.

"Yeah," I said. "We need to. Especially after what you said last night, I need to hold you in my arms for at least a little while."

"And rub shaved pubes together?" he asked.

"And other things."

We had our shirts off before we found an unoccupied campsite away from the others. We jumped into the back of the Bronco, jerking off our shoes, pants, and underwear. And when we spread a blanket over us Dan rolled on top of me.

He wrapped his arms under my shoulders, and I spread my legs for him, welcoming the weight of his body on mine, cocks to taut bellies, balls on balls. I stroked the long muscles of his back, and he gently ground against me.

We kissed and I grew even harder at the press of Daniel's firm lips to mine. I opened my mouth and welcomed his tongue, his taste. Our bellies kissed with each breath and our bodies felt long against each other; tall, lean, and muscled. Daniel was in my arms and my satisfied sigh rose from my soul itself.

"I'm gay," I whispered, dropping my hands to his butt. "I'm really, really gay!"

"Seany," he said, tenderly. "It never gets any better than this."

It was growing dark. I rested my head on his chest and laid my hand on his belly. Dan stroked my hair. A cool breeze blew through the open front windows and I snuggled closer to him under the blanket.

"What are you going to do about being a big brother for Trevor?" he asked.

"Try to figure out how to get out of it," I said.

"Why?"

"I don't have time to take on something like that," I said.

"It sounds like he needs someone like you, Seany. And he sure latched on to you."

"He was just glad to find somebody gay."

"Seany, Seany," Dan said gently, stroking my back. "Don't you know by now? You're human glue. People stick to you. You just have to get used to it. I have."

"Trevor can stick to someone else," I said.

"He's a cute kid," Dan pointed out.

"That's just it. He's a kid."

"So?"

"He's a kid," I repeated. "As in go to jail if you mess with him, kind of kid."

Dan kissed the top of my head, and drew his fingertips down my back. "Who said you had to have sex with him?"

I snorted. "He's gay, Dan."

"I know," Dan agreed. "But even if you did do anything with him, he's not that much younger than Ry. Or, for that matter look at you and Lenny. How much older is Lenny than you?"

"It's not the same, Dan, and you know it. Besides, even if I wasn't worried about Trevor being jailbait, I'd still be worried about screwing up his mind. You remember those bad dreams I had when I first started doing things with Ry, the evil doctor dreams? Those really bothered me. There's no way I'm going to mess up a kid like Trevor."

Daniel stroked my back, thoughtfully. "Maybe he just needs someone to talk to, Sean. You know how Lenny's place is a refuge for you. Maybe Trevor needs a friend who is a refuge for him."

"Possibly," I acknowledged. "But when we were wrestling today, he sprouted wood... I'm not sure he's interested in a refuge."

Dan nodded. "Yeah, he got hard. But that doesn't mean you have to do anything about it, or even that he wants to."

"Dan," I said. "I got hard, too."

Dan kissed the top of my head once again. "Is that what bothers you, your own reaction? You can still tell him 'no,' Sean. You don't have to have sex with him just because you both get hard. In fact, to be a good big brother, you probably shouldn't have sex with him at all."

"Exactly! He needs somebody who isn't going to get turned on by him," I said.

"Sean, he needs a gay big brother; someone who'll understand what he's going through. And it'd be damned hard to find a gay big brother for him who wouldn't get turned on by Trevor. He's an adorable kid."

"I don't know," I said, skeptically.

"You think just any other gay guy is going to be worried about protecting Trevor? Don't you imagine that there are guys out there who would love to be a sexual big brother to him and not give a shit about really helping him?" Daniel wrapped his arm over my shoulder and squeezed. I'm thinking you have an opportunity to do something really good here, Sean. All you have to do is exercise a little self control for a change."

"For a change? I've exercised plenty of self control before."

"Oh?" Dan asked with an amused chuckle.

"I have," I protested. "Like with Caitlyn."

Dan nodded. "OK, maybe you have with Caitlyn. So do it again. Exercise self control with Trevor."

I took a deep breath, thinking.

"You can do it," Dan said encouragingly. "I know you can do it. You like the kid, and you'll like taking care of him. Just don't let him get you alone."

I drew my fingers up the center seam of Dan's belly, considering.

"And by the way," Dan said. "I've told you before; you can do Caitlyn if it seems right sometime."

I chuckled. "Not worried about me and girls anymore?" I asked.

He shrugged. "Not as much, maybe," he answered. "Just don't get her pregnant."

I patted his tummy. "You're the only one I want to get pregnant."

"So," he said with a laugh. "We are majoring in genetics."

"Yeah," I said. "Lots of genetics."

Dan nuzzled the top of my hair. "Speaking of genetics and people sticking to you - I had a wild thought this weekend."

I lifted my head from his chest and moved up alongside him, laying my head beside his on the pillow and throwing my leg over his hip. His eyes glinted in the faint light as he looked into mine and smiled.

"Us doing Linda got me thinking," he said quietly, "about the X's and Y's and all, you know?"

I nodded.

"Like I was thinking - it was just a crazy thought - but wouldn't it be cool for us to find a girl like her, or maybe Linda herself, you know, for us to be together... you know, live together. And every night you could deposit your X's and Y's and then I could deposit mine and she could make babies for us and..." he let out a short laugh. "Crazy, I know... especially a girl and all. And I felt guilty for even thinking about it because of the promises we made Ry."

I chuckled. "And I'm not too sure how Linda would feel about being a genetics lab."

Dan grinned and played with the wavy ends of my hair. "I like her, Sean. Maybe we can do her again sometime."

I frowned.

"You don't want to?" he asked
.
"That's not it," I said. "I was just thinking of Ry."

"Do you think," Dan asked, "that Ry will still want to be with us later?"

"I don't know," I said honestly. "Do you mind if I hope he does?"

Dan smiled gently, moving his face very close to mine. "We're more together than ever, you and me. We're more in love than we've ever been." He kissed me lightly. "Honestly - absolutely honestly - we don't need Ry or Linda or anyone else."

"No," I agreed. "We don't need anybody else. But we love Ry, and he loves us. Maybe he needs us. " I stroked Daniel's soft cheek. "I suppose that Ry could still wind up falling in love with someone else... like his roommate, Nate. And honestly - absolutely honestly - I'd be sad. I really like Ry, Dan." I said, smiling apologetically. "But honestly - absolutely honestly - it will never be the same with anyone else as it is for you and me."

Dan slid an arm under my neck and another over my back and pulled our naked bellies together. "If Ry finds someone," he said. "And we never find a girl like Linda or somebody else like Ry, we'll be just fine."

I pressed my cheek to his and nodded, but I had mixed emotions. I always would have concerning Ryan. And I was beginning to wonder if introducing Daniel to sex with a girl had been entirely wise.

. . . . .

Ferg was sitting on my bed again. He's getting more use from that bed than I am, I thought, wryly.

Both he and Eric looked up when I came in and set my bag on the end of my bed, and a brown paper grocery sack on the desk. Eric's eyes went to the sack on the desk. "Is that food?" he asked. "Leftovers from the weekend?"

"You could call them leftovers," I replied.

As I settled into my desk chair, the two of them made a dash for the bag and then stood back after they opened it. Eric reached in cautiously and lifted out a pair of sky-blue panties. They turned to me, inquiringly.

"Leftovers," I said with a grin.

They looked back into the bag. "There must be a dozen pair of panties in here," Eric observed.

"Fourteen pair," I corrected.

Ferg stepped back from the bag. "You didn't wear these, did you?"

"No. Asshole."

Eric dropped the panties back into the bag with a frown. "Did other guys wear these?"

"Nope."

Eric turned his puzzled expression on me. "So how did you get fourteen pair of girls' panties?"

Feigning nonchalance, I opened my history book. "Girls threw them at me, of course," I told him.

"Threw them at you?" they asked in unison. "Why?" Ferg asked.

I shrugged. "They liked the way I danced for them."

. . . . .

Monday was warmer and partly cloudy; one of those typical South Texas, Fall days between cold fronts. My mood, though, was far from warm and sunny.

I had begun to know myself well enough to recognize my usual funk after a big weekend. And I particularly missed Daniel. Leaving him in Austin the day before had been harder than ever. I missed Ry as well. After talking about him at the park, I thought about him during the night; remembering our Sunday afternoons together, remembering his easy exuberance and energy, remembering how it was to hold his smaller body in my arms and make love to him. At least for now, I knew that I couldn't expect Dan to love Ry like I did. But our talk worried me that he might fall out of love with him completely.

It also bummed me that my knee was sore from the weekend. It might have been my imagination, but it also seemed a little swollen.

Then, to complete my funk, I was back at Trinity. If I was really honest, I'd admit that people were becoming friendly again. But it was still very different from before I was outed - back when Streak was a popular guy.

What happened at swimming that Monday afternoon didn't help. I guess though that it became inevitable as soon as the razor had hit my pubes that weekend before.

Coach had been pacing back and forth alongside the pool, his frown growing deeper after each dive. Finally, he blew his whistle and called the team over to the deck. I paused in my lap swimming to listen in.

"We've got a meet this weekend, people, and none of you are ready. We need focus. We need concentration. We need confidence. And we need it now."

He went on for a few minutes before allowing the divers back on the springboards. The diving didn't improve.

Coach kept them after their usual time. "You can take it in, Sullivan," he said when my usual quitting time came, but I hung back. I had planned that they'd all be out of the showers before I had to rinse and I had no desire for anyone to see my shaved pubes.

But coach kept them diving and looked like he had no intention of letting them quit any time soon. So finally, I headed for the showers, and after grabbing a towel, quickly dodged in to rinse my suit and myself off. I worked fast, but it's one of those unwritten laws of nature that when you least want to be seen is when you are most likely to be seen. Three swimmers, back for extra laps, entered the showers to rinse before swimming just as I finished, and while I was still several feet from my towel.

One, who I knew from classes, smiled in greeting. "Shaved down for swimming?" he asked.

I nodded, numbly.

They went on to shower and I was amazed that my shaved pubes hadn't fazed them. Maybe they weren't a big deal after all.

Figuring that I had just dodged a bullet, I wrapped my towel around me and headed back to my locker just as the divers filed in.

That's when I realized that, flustered by the entrance of the swimmers, I had forgotten my suit and goggles in the shower. I quickly headed back, just as the shower was filling with divers. I spotted my suit, hanging from a soap dispenser and dodged between the divers as I made a quick dash for it.

Shower spray immediately soaked my towel and without me realizing it would happen, the weight of the water dropped my towel when I reached for my suit. Guys who had been watching me from the corner of their eye, all turned my way. I fumbled for the towel, but didn't want to put it back around my waist after it had been on the shower floor.

I decided that if swimmers were used to shaved bodies, I wouldn't make a big deal of it, and simply headed for the door; suit, goggles, and soaked towel in hand. As I left the shower, there was an outburst of laughter behind me.

Oh well, I told myself. At least Dan would get a kick out of hearing the story. Unfortunately, so would the entire Trinity student body

. . . . .

I thought that calling Ry that night would help me feel better, but my timing was poor for that. Ry was homesick; really homesick. "I miss my Mom," he said. "And my brothers. I even miss my dad. And I miss you most of all, Sean. I dreamed about you last night," he said. "I dreamed we were behind the storage shed at your house. It was so real, Sean. I squeezed your shoulder muscles the way I used to like doing. And I pressed my fingers on your back, and you were just as strong and hard as I remembered you. We had really hot sex," he whispered. "I creamed my bed."

I chuckled. "Wish we could, Ry. I really wish we could."

Trying to change the conversation, I asked him about school, about his friends, and about Nate. According to him, there was one guy at his school that everybody laid, and a few other guys who screwed around quite a bit. But he and Nate stuck pretty much to each other.

"Have you fallen in love with each other yet?" I asked.

"I've told you before," Ry said. "I love you."

He took a deep breath. "I think about you all the time," he said. "I even planned how I could sneak out of here and hitch rides to San Antonio."

"Oh, bad idea, Ry," I said. "Just hang in there. You like the school, right? It's not like we won't be together. Christmas isn't that far off."

"You and Dan are doing the ear thing at Christmas. You probably won't even be home."

"We'll see, Ry. Just hang in there. I know how you feel. I get homesick, too. And I miss you, just like you miss me."

He was quiet a moment. "Tell me about Trinity, he said. Tell me about your friends."

I told him about my classes, about Tom, about Eric and Ferg. I told him about the weekend, without telling him that Daniel and I did a girl. It just didn't seem like the time. Then I mentioned Trevor, and Ry wanted to know all about him.

As I described Trevor and his family, I thought I heard a sob on the other end of the line.

"Ry?"

There was an outburst of sound over the phone and it took me a second to recognize that Ry was sobbing, almost uncontrollably.

"Ry?" I asked, terribly concerned. "Ry, what's wrong?"

He couldn't answer.

Tears filled my own eyes because Ry was hurting and there wasn't a damned thing I could do about it.

"Was it something I said?" I asked.

I heard him swallow and sniffle, and then sob again.

"Was it something I said about Trevor and his family?"

He fought his sobbing down. "Sean," Ry managed to say. "Don't let anybody take my place... please!"

"No one's going to take your place Ry," I assured him.

"But he's my age," he said. "That Trevor guy's my age."

"He's younger," I said. "And nothing like you. Ry, have some faith in me. No one's taking your place."

He took a shuddering breath, and sniffed.

"I wish I could take you in my arms right now, Ry. I'd give you a hug like you've never had before and you'd know for sure that no one will ever take your place."

I heard a small laugh. "You're going to make me hard again," he said.

"Again? Were you hard earlier? Cause I sure was. When I first heard your voice and you were talking about your dream."

He sniffed once more and then laughed lightly. "I was, too."

"And now," I said, slowly, "you're making me hard again."

"Are you alone?" Ry asked with a final sniffle.

"Yeah."

"Me, too." he said.

"Are you... rubbing yourself?" I asked.

'Yeah. I am," he said. "Let's get naked."

I didn't expect Eric back from Stacy's for a while. "OK," I said, making sure the doors were locked. After the weekend, I was far from horny, but it seemed important to go along with Ry.

"You naked?" he asked.

"Yep,"

"Are you jackin'?"

"I will now," I said.

"Tell me what we'll do when we get together," he said quietly. "Tell me everything; how it will feel and all."

"The very first thing," I said, "I'm going to take you into my arms..."

"Naked?"

"Naked. And I'm going to..."

"Your strong arms," he said. "I can feel them now. And your strong shoulders..."

"I'm going to hold you tight," I continued. "And we'll press our bodies together. I'll feel your cock against me for the first time in ages..."

"And I'll feel your big one..."

"And then I'll kiss you," I said. "You'll open your mouth to mine..."

Ry moaned, and I slid all the way down on my bed.

. . . . .

The next morning, I dropped in to talk with a counselor. When I asked about transferring to UT at Christmas, she almost laughed me out of her office. She not only acted like it was unlikely that UT would let me in mid-year, especially on such short notice, but also suggested that I would be likely to lose credit for most of what I'd taken at Trinity.

"At least finish this year," she suggested. "A transfer will go much better with the beginning of a school year."

With no easy way to pay for classes at UT, wasting tuition was almost as hard to stomach as wasting time.

I resigned myself to staying at Trinity until the end of the school year.

. . . . .

The next afternoon, Coach gathered us together at the bleachers after warm up. His mood was still dark from the day before as he gave everyone the timetable for the weekend meet. Afterward, as the divers headed for the boards and I prepared to start my laps, Ken hung back.

He said something to Coach

"Room assignments will be exactly the same as last time, Kawamoto," Coach said angrily; and loudly enough for all to hear.

Ken glanced nervously at me and headed quickly for the three-meter board. Everyone glanced in my direction and Caitlyn's look was the only sympathetic one.

I got into the water quickly to hide my embarrassment, and I left the pool as quickly as I could when my laps were done. I didn't even bother heading to the cafeteria for supper, but gathered my books and headed for Lenny's instead.

No one answered the door. Lenny's Pinto was gone, but I checked the greenhouse and back yard just to be sure. Not willing to simply return to campus, I sat down on the front porch and opened my books.

I didn't mind sitting there. Between missing Daniel, worrying about Ry, and the discomfort of my notoriety at school, I was glad to just be away in a quiet place. Lenny's porch might not be the sanctuary that lying on Lenny's couch was, but it was sanctuary enough.

It was almost dark when I considered heading back. That's when Lenny finally pulled into the drive.

"Hey, baby," he said with a delighted smile as he climbed the steps to the porch. "I've missed you."

"Yeah, me too," I said, nodding in agreement.

"Don't hug me," Lenny told me as he reached for his keys. "I know you like me sweaty, but I'm really bad tonight. "I'll let you in and I'll be in as soon as I haul some stuff to the back."

"I'll help," I offered.

"Nah, it's all filthy stuff. Have you eaten?"

"No."

"Well, you can fix us supper while I finish and then shower up."

"What do you have that I can fix?" I asked.

He grinned. "Find something."

Lenny came to the kitchen in short shorts only, his wet hair combed back flat against his head. "OK, Baby," he said, coming up behind me at the stove. "Now you can hug me."

When I turned, Lenny looped his arms around my neck and pressed his body to mine. Smiling broadly, he kissed me and held the kiss until I felt him stirring. Then he leaned back. "You smell good," he said. "I love it when you smell like a swimming pool."

I laughed.

"Really," he said. Then he sniffed and looked past me at the stovetop. "What is it?"

"A skillet dinner I found in your pantry; tuna."

"Sounds great! I'm starved."

Over supper and cleanup afterward, Lenny told me first of his weekend and that he was confident he would get the landscaping job he wanted. Then he asked about my weekend and I told him about being bummed.

"Spend the night," Lenny said as we stood to carry our plates to the sink. "I'll give you a rub down while you study. And then I'll make sure you get a good night's sleep. You'll feel a lot better in the morning." He rubbed the back of my neck. "I know you're down," he said, "but it sounds like you had a good weekend."

I nodded. "Yeah, it was good."

He pulled me into a hug and ran his fingers into the back of my hair. "I want to see your costume sometime."

I grinned. "I knew you would. I saved it. Maybe tomorrow night I'll bring it over."

Lenny kissed me. "Go take off your clothes and leave them in my room. Come out in a towel and I'll give you that rubdown."

The towel was for lying on, not wearing. Lenny insisted on spreading it out for me. "Oh, Sean," he said when he saw my shaved pubes. "You have to spend the night."

He had me on my stomach in the living room rubbing my back when the doorbell rang. "Just stay there," he said, pulling back on his shorts. "I'll get rid of whoever it is." He tossed a throw blanket over my butt.

Lenny opened the door to a storm of squealed greetings, and it sounded like a whole flock of drag queens fluttered inside.

"Oh, Lettie," one of them called out in falsetto. "Who is this?"

"He's beautiful, Lenny," another said, kneeling beside me. "Are you Sean?"

I nodded, while trying to figure the best way out of the living room.

Lenny forestalled that when he straddled my butt. "Ladies, this is Sean," he said. "Sorry we aren't better dressed, but I was just giving him a backrub."

Several high voices gave approval. With a glance around the room, I counted two guys in drag outright, and four in some degree of cross dress. From my angle on the floor, it was hard to tell much more. I gave a general wave, and received several, sexy answers of "Hi, Sean" in return.

I groaned inwardly. Though, for the next several seconds, compliments about my appearance rounded the room, all I could think was that my relaxed evening was blown and I just wanted to sneak off to Lenny's bed. It may have been impolite, but I rested my head on the back of my hands and closed my eyes. At least I could leave the room, mentally.

"Can I touch him?" One of them asked.

"No, you can't touch him," Lenny replied, sounding scandalized. "Leave the poor boy alone. He's had a rough week."

"But he's beautiful, Lettie. Pull the blanket off and let us see all of him."

If Lenny said anything, I didn't hear it. I just assumed he told them to go to hell. Instead, after only a moment, he did something that I hadn't expected. He pulled the blanket off me, leaving me bare.

There was a collective "Ah," as I looked up in surprise at Lenny.

"Damn it, Lenny!" I said, getting to my feet.

There were a few more "Ahs" at the sight of my front side and a couple of hoots; exactly what I was not in the mood for. I stormed off to Lenny's room to get my clothes.

Lenny followed, and closed the door behind us. "I'm sorry, Baby," he said with a small smile.

I glared at him. "I thought," I said, "that this was the one place I could come and just relax; just be me. I get all the staring I want at school. I spent Saturday night as naked as I care to be in front of a room full of people. I'm not going to be some thing for you to show off to your friends." I pulled on my underwear.

Lenny recoiled in surprise.

In fact, he looked so surprised that for a moment, I wondered whether I was overreacting. I decided that I didn't care. I was pissed. I pulled on my pants.

"Sean... I..." began Lenny.

"Forget it," I said as I sat down to pull on my socks. "I'm a person, Lenny."

"And I'm a very sorry person," he said, kneeling beside me. "I'm very, very sorry."

I pulled on the second sock and picked up my first shoe. Lenny placed his hand on my arm. "Please, Sean. It was stupid. I wasn't thinking. Please forgive me."

"I think I better get back to the dorm."

"Sean," he said, squaring off on his knees and clasping me by both biceps. "I didn't think you were like this; moody and all."

"I didn't think you were like this either, Lenny. I didn't know I was just some... some male mistress for you to brag about."

Lenny searched my eyes. "I don't know how serious we are, Babe; you and me," he said softly, "but neither of us is a mistress." He gently squeezed my arms. "I couldn't help but brag about you, Baby." Then he cocked his head, considering another idea. "Or is it that those are all queens in the living room? Does that bother you?"

I looked him in the eye. "No. And that's never bothered me about you either. No matter how outrageous you can be, I know that you're smart as hell, and you're deep, and I've really admired you, Lenny. But not tonight. Tonight, you just didn't care."

He leaned forward, clutching my arms more tightly. "I care now, Sean," he said softly. "I care more than you imagine."

His light gray eyes were sincere, searching.

I sighed. "Maybe I'm just really tired," I said.

"And depressed. I knew that," he said, sitting up onto the bed beside me. "I just wasn't thinking, and I'm sorry. But I can't help being proud of you. I've never had a friend like you, Sean. I suppose I've told everybody about you." He smiled a bittersweet smile. "This weekend, I was at a party and you were all I could talk about."

"What'd you tell people?" I asked.

He smiled and cast his eye downward. "I told them we were very good friends."

"Very good?"

He nodded. "Very good." He glanced at me. "At least until tonight."

"Shit, Lenny," I said, hanging my head and patting his knee. "We're still good friends. You know that. Friends can get pissed off at each other. I'm just sorry that I behaved like I did in front of your buddies out there."

"It was my fault," he said. I won't be stupid like that again.

"I'll try not to be stupid either," I said. Then I couldn't help smiling. "You really are proud of me?"

He grinned. "Yeah. Do you mind that I wanted to show you off?"

I shook my head. "Nah. I understand that. I've felt that way about Daniel since the beginning. And," I said, warning him, "it'd be easy to feel that way about you, too. You better be ready for me to pull a blanket off you sometime."

He laughed and threw an arm over my shoulders. "I've done porn, baby. Remember? I don't embarrass easily."

I nodded. "It wasn't embarrassment, Lenny. Any other time, I probably wouldn't have minded being shown off. I just wasn't in the mood at all."

He smiled and kissed my cheek. "I won't ever assume you are again," he whispered.

I nuzzled his neck.

"So how naked do you want me to be when we go back out there?" I asked quietly.

Lenny thought a moment. "I've got another pair of shorts like these. Think they'd fit?" he asked. "I'll show you off and then I'll get rid of everybody as soon as possible. I promise."

"I don't know," I said. "You're pretty hippy. Your shorts will probably fall off me."

He playfully rapped the back of my head.

. . . . .

After his friends were gone, Lenny insisted on finishing the backrub... on his bed... both of us naked. When he rolled me to my back, his lips joined his hands, working down my body.

From the dark skin of his face, his gray eyes stood out dramatically in the dim light. He watched my eyes as his mouth closed over my cock and his hands slid up my sides. He watched me as he bobbed deeper and deeper until he finally closed his eyes and grabbing my butt, took me deep into his throat.

But my eyes stayed open, watching him until everything grew vague in a sexual haze.

We talked after that; not about anything in particular. We talked to mend our relationship, to re-bond. He stayed hard, and when he was ready, he fondled my balls and sucked my nipples until I was erect again.

I rolled him to his back, and spreading his legs, lowered myself onto him, cock to cock. We wrapped each other up and opened our mouths to each other; grinding.

I fell asleep that way, lying on Lenny, cum pressed between our bellies; as he stroked my back and his breath ruffled my hair. "You can always be yourself here," he whispered as I drifted off in sleep. "And tomorrow, I'll give you a key so you never have to wait on the porch again."