A whole week of practices were behind him. Walking through the hall on Monday morning, he saw Darrell Gruenrath.

It was one of his nightmares. Real bad news. He'd never seen him anywhere in the neighbourhood or the local school system before. He was sure he would have noticed him back in grade ten. Maybe he was visiting for some reason. Danny didn't stop, he walked right by the guy hoping he wouldn't be noticed. What was he doing there? Danny had assumed he must live in one of the city's "tony" neighbourhoods further south.

But in the cafeteria at lunch, Darrell and a couple of guys Danny didn't know found him eating with Ken. They surrounded him. He said nothing, tried to finish eating so he could leave. Darrell was looking at him. "Well, look who's here, fairy boy Danny. You still slapping girls? Do you know, boys, this is the queer that slapped my girlfriend when we were over in Greece, and I never did have a chance to even the score."

He couldn't just keep his mouth shut the way he did when he was overseas. "Leave me alone. You know she hit me first. What was I supposed to do? I'm sorry I had to slap her. How about you just go find somebody else to bother?"

"Look, motherfucker, I just got to this shitty school. No sooner do I get here than I find you. No one told me I was coming to a fag-infested institution of lower learning."

"What are you doing here, Darrell? Why aren't you back with your friends in Forest Hill?"

"That is none of your beeswax, fairy boy. But I'll tell you what I don't want from you. I don't want to see your queer ugly face anywhere near me. Not in school, not out of school. I'll give you one week to find another school and transfer out. After that, if you're still here, the whole school will know what a queer you are."

With that, he walked away with his lackeys following him. One of them hit Danny hard on the forehead with the heel of his hand as he was leaving.

Ken looked shocked. "Danny, what was that about? How do you know this guy? What happened?"

"Who is that guy, anyway? I know his two flunkies, they're assholes in grade 12 I think, but I never saw the guy who was talking to you."

"It's a long story. I can't talk about it. I think I have to talk to Mr. Fields." Mr. Fields was the vice-principal responsible among other things for student discipline. They were told back in grade 10 when school began that if they encountered any "behaviour problems," they should see Mr. Fields.

"Well, if you need any help with those guys, just say the word. I will help you deal with them, I promise. Hey, you're coming to the practice today, right?"

"You know, you surprised me this year, you seem to be in pretty good shape, a lot better than what you used to be and better than a lot of the guys. I hope you make the team. And get a helmet."

"Thanks, I hope so too. Based on what the coach said, we should have it soon I hope."

Danny couldn't finish his lunch. He wrapped it up for the garbage and stood. "Don't worry about it, okay? There's nothing to be done. He's probably just blowing off steam." Leaving everyone behind, he walked off, left the school and walked the streets nervously for the next twenty minutes until it was time for his next class.

He was worried, depressed. This was what he feared would happen last year, but nothing did, so he thought he was in the clear. He got through the afternoon classes in a foggy, preoccupied state of mind. What should he do now?

Each day's football practice felt tougher than the day before. In addition to all the conditioning stuff like laps and wind sprints in full pads, they practised blocking and tackling. It was all pretty new to him. He'd always enjoyed the "friendly" blocking they allowed in their touch games over the summer, but there was a lot he had to learn now for the first time. He'd never done tackling before and never been tackled.

Coach Taylor and the two seniors were focused on teaching now, showing them the right and wrong ways. It seemed pretty understandable. But actually being able to tackle someone, especially when you were tired and wearing all those pads, that would take practice. Tackling a runner is hard and takes a lot out of you. And blocking takes a lot of thinking as well as skill because it's easy to make an illegal block that can cost the team a 15 yard penalty.

They'd also begun working on offensive plays and defensive tactics. He was tentatively playing split end, but he also learned the defensive backfield responsibilities as a backup.

Danny was very tired after another two hour practice. He showered quickly and walked home with his books. It was getting to be exhausting. Of the over 50 guys that came out for the team originally, after the first week a couple were out with injuries and about ten more had quit. Danny guessed he was able to keep going because he was in half decent shape to start with. With Coach Taylor's encouragement and his promise to the coach, he found he really wanted to do this and do it well. It was the first time he'd participated in an organized sport and didn't want to let the coach down. Still no helmet, though. And now he had Darrell to worry about.

Over dinner, his dad asked how the practices were going. Danny described what they'd been doing, how the coach was escalating it every day, all those guys dropping out along the way. Alex seemed impressed at the effort he was making.

Their first game was still three weeks away and they had a lot of work to do before then. Thursday and Friday came and went. The helmet showed up on Friday and fit perfectly.

Friday's practice seemed a little easier. He felt like he was fitting in and making progress. The team was starting to come together. The coach would be posting the names of all the players to make the team after the practice the coming Monday afternoon.

"Hey Danny, you ever played poker? Seven card stud? Barry and I are trying to get a game together, maybe on a regular basis, on Friday nights. It's for money, but don't worry, it's just pennies, nickels and dimes, five cent ante, maximum raise is ten cents."

Danny was happy to be invited. "Yeah, I'd love to play, thanks Mike. Where and what time?"

"Tonight we're going to play at my house. Maybe we'll rotate in the future, we'll see how it goes. We want to start around 7:30."

"Sure, I can make that. I know where you live. I just have to check with my parents first."

Danny thought for a second, Shawn and Matthew, he wondered if Mike would be okay with them. Why not, they're nice guys. "What about Shawn and Matthew? I don't know them very well yet but they're funny guys." Shawn and Matthew were twins from Jamaica. Both were trying out for the football team.

"Sure, I guess that would be okay. I only know them from playing football. But I don't see why not. You have their phone number?"

"Yeah, I was talking with Shawn the first day of school and got their number, I see they're already gone so I'll call them when I get home. I'll let you know."

"Okay, but I'll be watching you carefully, you won't get away with anything. I guess you're an old card shark from way back, right?"

Danny arrived with around three dollars, which would be his limit. His parents gave him a small allowance, sometimes grudgingly, in exchange for doing various chores around the house so he couldn't afford to lose much money gambling, even in a low stakes game.

Of the group at Mike's house, Danny was the only one who knew Ken well. They talked about football practices and other ongoing aspects of school life, even as one seven card stud hand after another was dealt and played. At first Ken just played quietly. Danny wanted to bring him into the conversation, so at the first opportunity, he told Owen and Barry that Ken used to live downtown in an old neighbourhood but just moved up to their area last winter.

Barry began asking where he used to go to school, did he have any brothers or sisters, and eventually they got to talking about the science classes at King High. Ken said he had better science teachers at King in both grades 10 and 11 than those at his previous school, and began talking about physics. It was a neat surprise for Barry, that he and Ken both loved science. Barry was probably the single smartest student in the school. Ken and Barry ended up going back and forth most of the evening about physics and chemistry.

They had a great time playing poker. The boys were full of life, had funny stories and great senses of humour. Alex had taught Danny to play seven card stud poker a couple years ago, so he knew the basics. He ended up down about a dollar for the evening. Owen was the winner. It amazed Danny that someone with a mind as sharp as Barry's, with something of a photographic memory, could also be so modest and graceful. He never had a bad word for anyone, could talk with anyone about anything, and was always happy to help teach someone having trouble with school work.

Barry mentioned he knew the boy Gray Samuelson in their homeroom who was always in a sour mood and had few friends. He'd moved to the area a couple years earlier. He said Gray's an excellent athlete, wanted to play for the school football team but couldn't because he had a part-time job working at the supermarket near the school to help support his family. Gray was tall and definitely athletic with a slim, nicely shaped body. In fact, he was so beautiful that in gym Danny had to make a conscious effort to keep his eyes off both him and Mike.

"Hey, Barry," Danny said, "happen to know how he got called 'Gray'? That's a pretty unusual name."

"Um, let's see, he said it's short for Grayson. Ah, yes, his full name is Cornelius Grayson Samuelson. He hates the first name and refuses to use it."

He went for the appointment with Mr. Fields on Monday 30 minutes before school began. It was the start of the third week of grade 11.

He told the vice-principal that he had a history with Darrell Gruenrath but couldn't be specific as it was too personal for him to talk about. He explained that Darrell had threatened him a week ago.

"Young man… ", he paused, shuffling some notes looking for something, then, "Daniel, this school is five years old, it has no history of violence or bullying, nothing like that has happened here before that I know of. It will be very hard for me to head off anything if I don't know the reason why it might happen. That's why I need to know what is going on but you won't tell me so there is nothing else I can do at this point if you won't disclose for me this deep, dark secret you have. I warn you, you are not to start anything or get into any fights, if you do you could be expelled. You've been a good student here so far, we don't want any trouble, so watch what you do and don't get on my wrong side, do you understand?"

Shit, Danny thought, he's blaming it on me? Maybe he'd be better off switching schools. He'd go home and talk to his parents. It would be easy to take a bus to Northside Secondary School which he thought was the next closest high school. He couldn't have this thing with Darrell hanging over his head.

"Um, Mr. Fields sir, how do I transfer to another school? Is there some form I have to fill out? I hope it's not a big deal."

"Young man, you can't just run away from your problems like that. You need a very good reason to transfer schools. The board doesn't allow students to go to schools outside the district they live in without a good reason, it would have to go through an approval process. Before you even do that, I would need to speak to your parents. They will have to approve any such transfer and so will I before it goes any further."

Well, that was out, his parents would want to know why and there was no way he could ever tell them. He could just hear his mother…

Danny left the office. It seemed useless talking to that man. He would have to be on guard all the time and hope Darrell was bluffing, he thought. People make threats all the time, right? Why can't Fields call Darrell in and warn him? He's the one that started this. No, not a good idea, Fields will tell him I was there complaining, then Darrell will bad-mouth me all over the school as a fairy and a snitch, and suck up to Fields. Or maybe he'll tell Fields what happened, make me out to be the bully, then Fields will hate me too.

What to do? I know, he decided, I'll find Darrell, get him alone and talk to him. I could explain to him I'm trying to transfer out but need a good reason and it takes time, I'll ask him for a little more time. I'm sure he'll give me some time if he sees I'm trying. I don't want trouble. Shit, I don't want anything to do with him, why can't he just disappear? Sometimes I wish I was dead.

First thing Barry said to him when he sat down was, "That guy who was bothering you at lunch a couple weeks ago, I found out from a friend of my brother who's in grade 13 that he's a senior, his last name is Gruenrath, and he won't lay a finger on you in school because he got kicked out of his last school for fighting. He used to be down at Forest Hill in the City. I think he's probably here on probation; our school board probably told him they'll kick him out if the same thing happens here."

Sally had a big warm smile and pretty teeth. No one wonder Mike likes her, he thought. The two of them teased each other, occasionally touching. They placed their lunches on the table, began eating and chattered away.

Danny and Barry were still talking about something when Mike suddenly said to no one in particular, "Oh, I forgot, there's a dance on Friday after school." Then he turned to Sally and right there in front of everyone asked her, "Would you like to go to the dance with me on Friday?"

"Mike," said Danny, "you're putting Sally on the spot in front of everyone. If she says no, you'll be pretty embarrassed, won't you?"

"Sometimes you just gotta take a chance, man. Like you did with Miss Evanston last year!"

"Yeah, Miss Evanston. You're in grade 10, Sally, you weren't here last year, you probably didn't hear about it. The whole school knew the story. Danny was famous! Wait now—Danny is the guy I already told you about, remember the story about the Fanny Hill book report?"

"Wow, that's you, you're that Danny? There's a few different Danny's here, you know. I feel like I should ask for your autograph."

But Mike went on to tell for probably the hundredth time the story of the Fanny Hill book report, which seemed to have grown more outrageous and less accurate by the day as it passed from one person to the next. Mike was now an expert on the subject. Supposedly Danny memorized a lot of dialogue full of dirty words and recited all of it word for word in front of Miss Evanston as part of the book report to prove he'd actually read the book. Danny was laughing too hard at Mike and spilled his half pint of milk, which he barely cared about, Mike was so funny when he was kind of warmed up like that, all Danny could do was interject with protests and denials.

"That's unbelievable," said Sally. "That book is banned in Canada it's so disgustingly filthy - I'd love to read it, Danny, can you lend it to me? I have Evanston for English. She's scary. You make a mistake, she's all over you, critical and sarcastic. We're all afraid of her. By the way, did you actually recite memorized dialogue full of swear words in English class with Evanston as your audience?"

"That's ridiculous! There's not a dirty word in the whole story, and anyway, I didn't quote a single line! No! I wish I could say yes, but the honest answer is (a) I didn't quote any dialogue because like you I don't enjoy memorization, no matter how many bad words there are, and anyway I did it on the spur of the moment, I didn't do any preparation, it was right off the top of my head, and um, um, where was I? Oh yeah, and second, there's no dirty dialogue anywhere in the story, the author was kind of upper class, the novel doesn't contain a single curse word.

"It's a classy classic novel, really, you know, it has, like, upper class aristocrats. It's about every kind of sex you've ever dreamed about and some you haven't. About people who have sex that's, um, pretty gross. It's written by a smart man. I think he may have written it tongue in cheek as they say, although in the story his tongue was in some pretty strange places, some parts of it are ridiculous and only a brilliant imagination could dream them up. I mean, I sure couldn't have done that. In real life people don't do that stuff, do they? At least not that I know of, but what do I know? I'm not exactly an expert..."

"Sally, you remember when you went to a birthday party when you were eight years old and the children played a game called Broken Telephone?"

"Ah, got it! That's what happens around here when you tell someone a story. By the time it gets through all the connections, it's practically a new story. People can't keep their mouths shut, especially when they don't know what they're talking about."

Sally thought about that for a moment. Then she's staring at Mike with a glint in her eye and an amused look on her face while she talks out of the side of her mouth to his friend. "So, Danny, anyway, what were we talking about? Oh yeah, getting back to Mike asking me out in front of the whole school, he's not really taking a chance, every other guy who wants to bring a date already has one and I'm the last girl left so Mike doesn't have much choice now, does he?"

Mike sat for a few seconds chewing with his half-full mouth open. "I have newsh for you, Shally," he said, "you're the firsht and only girl I ashed out." He paused for a moment. "And I don't mind saying that in front of these guys because I know they're good guys who will keep their mouths shut, they're my buddies."

"Well, Michael, I'm going to the dance with you whether you like it or not, and that's that, and don't you dare stand me up!" What an actress, she should go into show business.

"I wouldn't dare stand you up! And don't you forget about it, we have a real date!"

"Oh yes you do. You promised to call me the other day but you forgot. You need more mental exercise. You should do the newspaper crossword puzzles every day!"

"I would if I could remember to. Now, where's my tonic water. I know I have one around here."

Danny pointed out, "It's right here, Sally, in front of you. Right under your nose."

"Maybe too much coffee? You shouldn't drink coffee, it's just an excuse for using a drug."

"No silly, it's sugar-free. You're driving me crazy, Michael. Why do you keep doing that?"

"If I don't keep correcting you, you'll keep doing it, and then everyone, not just me, will know you're crazy."

"Yes, that's one of the reasons I like you so much. You know I'm crazy! I'm crazy about you. I know you are too."

"It's a good thing for you that I like you, otherwise I'd divorce you. By the way, what are you planning to wear to the dance? I mean, I don't want you to embarrass yourself. I might have to come to your house to see what you're going to wear. Some boys have no fashion sense."

"You can't divorce me, silly, we're not married. Just ask my lawyer. What's your legal opinion, Danny?"

"Um, back there a while ago, I think you said Sally is silly. Sally, you shouldn't play dress-up. Mike can dress himself, I'm sure he can figure out that he needs to have some clothes to wear. On the other hand, he probably won't mind if you want to un-dress him."

"You have a very dirty mind, Danny, see what happens when you read Fanny Hill? And you didn't answer the question. What's your legal opinion about whether I can divorce Michael?"

"I'm in grade 11, Mike. All I'm good at is catching footballs, writing letters to newspaper editors and jack… I mean, uh, playing piano."

"Why does everyone think I'm going to be a lawyer? Half my teachers have said that."

"Dr. Stavros's opinion is that you're both crazy. Look, I have to go. I'll see you all later."

He took Mike aside. "I hope Sally is okay with teasing, I don't want her to take it the wrong way."

"Are you kidding, Danny? She loves it. We play little word games like that all the time. She's twice as smart as me. When I don't understand something, I go to her, she knows the answers right off the top of her head. I actually feel a little nervous around her because of that."

They were laughing it up. He felt part of something. He liked having friends, real friends, for maybe the first time in his life. He stood, stepped into the aisle, turned to pick up his garbage and throw it out on the way out of the cafeteria. He had found a bunch of great kids who he really liked, he hoped they'd like him enough to keep him around for a while… he watched with amazement as a boy flew by him, wondering what might possess the boy to do that as he landed on the floor, yelling at … his left shoulder screams with pain, something hits him hard on the back of the head, can't breathe, face down on the floor rapidly blacking out… has no breath, can't move sweating dizzy spinning whorling black…

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The Nonconformist

by Ken Cohen

Chapter 5

Friends and Foes