INTP

by Nico Grey

Part 1

Oatmeal.

Again.

The boy sighed as he sat down at the table. The bowl was already waiting for him.

'Hello porridge, my old friend,' Josiah Brantley hummed softly to himself. 'I break my fast with you again. The nutritious way I always start the day. Because it's easy, fast and cheap as hay.' His eyes darted to either end of the table, making certain that his parents weren't paying any more attention to him than they usually did.

He sighed again. It wasn't that his parents didn't love him. It was just that they didn't seem to understand that there might possibly be small things that could really improve the quality of his life; an occasional bit of attention, showing some interest in the things that he enjoyed, even something as simple as a breakfast menu that varied occasionally. Enrichment, they were starting to call it in school. But enrichment wasn't entirely practical. And Walter and Marion Brantley were nothing if not practical.

Josiah used his spoon to excavate in the oatmeal, hoping to find something hidden inside the beige gruel; nuts, raisins, maybe even some fresh fruit. But he found nothing. Just quick, easy, nutritious, warm and soggy oats. Pablum for practical people, he snickered to himself.

"I hope you didn't let the Christmas break distract you." Josiah was startled to discover that his father had lowered his newspaper and was addressing him. He also couldn't figure out what might have distracted him over the Christmas vacation. The family hadn't gone anywhere. There had been no visitors. Josiah ran a few miles every day. Aside from that, he had spent most of the holiday reviewing his course work and reading ahead in material his classes would be covering over the next few weeks.

"Second quarter report cards will be out before the end of the month," his father reminded him. "You had better stay focused on your schoolwork. Your mother and I won't be satisfied with anything less than straight 'A's."

Josiah knew better than to protest. Besides, he never got less than 'A's. He had been reminded many times that he needed 'A's straight through four years of high school if he was to get into the sort of college that his parents expected him to attend. And they expected him to get grades that would also secure scholarships to pay for his schooling. After all — something he had heard every day of the almost-fifteen-and-a-half years of his life — his parents weren't made of money.

Josiah nodded obediently and decided to pay closer attention to his oatmeal. Depending on the circumstance, it wasn't always completely uninteresting.

Josiah spent the twenty-five minutes of his bus ride to Ball Mountain Union High School with his nose buried in a textbook. It wasn't riveting reading. But it was a practical distraction compared to the whirl of vapid conversations about Christmas presents and holiday trips that occupied everyone else on the bus.

It might have been even more productive for Josiah to run to school. He tried to get in several miles every day to keep in shape, especially in between cross country and track seasons. But living south of East Grange, the six miles to the high school was a little more distance than was reasonable, especially with unpredictable winter weather and some of the crazy out-of-state drivers on the roads during ski season. His parents hadn't exactly forbidden him to run back and forth to school, but Josiah was himself practical enough to recognize that it wasn't safe to risk the traffic, poor driving conditions and impatient drivers, many of whom weren't very familiar with the roads or the driving conditions.

Instead, Josiah made time for his running after school and on weekends. He ran cross country in the fall, and for the track team in the spring, because running was the sort of practical sport that he could continue throughout his entire life. His father had drummed that message into him from an early age. As Josiah got older, he found that it was one piece of his father's advice that he could embrace wholeheartedly. He recognized the health benefits of running to stay in shape. He also appreciated that it was a way to keep active that he could pursue alone. That appealed to him.

When he arrived at school, Josiah deposited his jacket and some of his books in his locker, then made his way directly to homeroom. He took his customary seat in the back of the classroom and opened a book.

None of the other students had arrived yet. Most were still milling about the hallways or in the cafeteria, getting caught up with friends they hadn't seen since the start of the holiday break.

Mr. Gilchrist was already sitting at his desk in the front of the room. He was a young teacher who enjoyed interacting with his students. But he had learned that Josiah was more comfortable tending to his own business, so he offered a friendly smile in greeting, then left Josiah to his own devices.

As students slowly started to drift into homeroom, Josiah kept a surreptitious eye on the activity while his nose stayed buried in his book. He understood that most of the social activity going on around him wasn't practical, but that didn't prevent him from being interested in it, or from the occasional urge to join in. He didn't understand that feeling. It was an odd intrusion in his mind that only served to confuse him.

The first arrivals were mostly girls. The boys and the really popular girls waited a little longer before surrendering themselves to the confines of a classroom and the start of the school routine.

Josiah noticed some of the early arrivals glancing toward the back of the room, where he was sitting. The attention was mostly harmless. If anyone appeared to be more interested, if their body language suggested they might be considering joining him, Josiah had learned that he could deflect their interest by turning away slightly and becoming even more involved with his reading.

Occasionally he found it confusing. Sometimes he hoped that one of the girls — maybe one of the pretty but quiet ones like Amy Hampton or Jodi Corse — would join him. But longstanding habit took over. Without even consulting him, his body sent out its signals that effectively discouraged interest. Josiah could be deeply conflicted.

It didn't take long for Josiah to slip back into the school day routine. Two weeks of vacation wasn't really any more exciting than being in school, at least for Josiah, so it didn't take any time at all for his mind and body to adjust to the change.

For most students, Math class wouldn't be the most exciting way to start the day. It really wasn't for Josiah, either. But in his mind it was just another class to be endured, in which to put in the work necessary to earn his customary 'A', before getting on to the next class.

His third period English Composition class was more of a challenge for Josiah. It wasn't that English was difficult for him. It really wasn't. He actually enjoyed English. He had earned his 'A' for the first quarter and he knew that he would continue to maintain that grade through the end of the school year.

The problem was the English teacher. Mr. Fisher was a good guy. He was friendly, engaging and entertaining. He seemed to care a lot about his students. He cared particularly about students who were athletic; especially those who might be able to contribute to his varsity soccer team.

Already entering the fifth month of the school year, Mr. Fisher still hadn't succumbed to Josiah's subtle signals that discouraged personal interest — although he had given up on trying to persuade Josiah to address him as "Pax". But the soccer team was several years removed from their last state championship, Mr. Fisher knew that Josiah was a very capable and dedicated runner, and in his heart hope sprung eternal. He was almost intolerably optimistic.

Josiah quietly shoehorned himself into the back of the classroom and did his best to avoid unwelcome attention. During class, Mr. Fisher conducted a free-form discussion about choices made by the authors in the composition of three stories he had assigned as reading over the holiday break — he really did believe that his class should be entertaining and educational — and didn't go out of his way to draw Josiah into the conversation. When the bell rang to mark the end of the period, Josiah briefly congratulated himself on escaping another class without any social interactions that increased his stress level.

"Oh, Mr. Brantley!" Mr. Fisher waved to get his attention before Josiah could slip out the back of his classroom. He had a shit-eating grin on his face.

Josiah just rolled his eyes. He knew he could never make himself call Mr. Fisher "Pax".

"I hear you got together with Ian over the break."

Josiah was confused. Mr. Fisher was acting like he couldn't possibly have heard any more interesting news. And who the heck was Ian?

"During my homeroom this morning, he mentioned that you saw each other. I got the impression that you were running together." Now Mr. Fisher looked confused.

"I don't think so," Josiah replied carefully. "Who's Ian?"

"Little guy. Dark red hair. Freshman." Mr. Fisher played his trump card. "He started varsity for me this year and he's going to be my star midfielder for the next three years."

Josiah wasn't any closer to enlightenment. "What's his last name?"

"Corse. Ian Corse." Mr. Fisher's eyebrows drew together. "I thought he said… "

"Oh!" Josiah brightened uncharacteristically. "Is he Jodi Corse's younger brother?"

"Cousins, I think," the teacher frowned. "I had Jodi in my homeroom last year and they definitely don't have the same parents."

That was disappointing news, but Josiah tried to puzzle out the mystery. Ian. Small kid. Freshman. Red hair. "I think he might be in my Psychology class," he finally realized. As he thought about it, the kid in his Psychology class bore a very strong resemblance to Jodi.

"Yeah. That sounds like Ian," Mr. Fisher said. "You have to be pretty smart to get into upper level electives as a freshman. Ian is the Class of '28's Josiah Brantley… Except he plays soccer," he added. Then he grinned expectantly.

Josiah had been fending off Mr. Fisher's advances for months. He was experienced. "No, we didn't see each other over the break," he said. Then he left.

Josiah didn't have a lot of time to consider his encounter with Mr. Fisher during his Physical Education class. Mr. Wyman kept his students running to help them "knock off the rust" from their Christmas break. Josiah didn't mind the running. But Mr. Wyman's penchant for breaking up the endurance running with wind sprints didn't allow him time to clear his mind and think.

During his lunch break, Josiah did pay more attention to what was happening than was usual for him. He saw the little red-haired kid from his Psychology class, but he wasn't eating with Jodi Corse. They were almost on opposite sides of the cafeteria. Josiah noted again the rather strong resemblance in their appearance. He knew that Jodi was smart and the kid, as Mr. Fisher had pointed out, was a freshman in an upper level elective class. Josiah decided that he could believe they were related. He hoped that they were a close family. Maybe a little interaction with the kid during class time could provide a clue or two about how he might get to know Jodi better.

Josiah was rather surprised to find himself more distracted than usual during his Chemistry class. His mind kept wandering to thoughts of Jodi and her freshman cousin. He never gave much consideration to social interactions with his peers, but he thought Jodi seemed nice. Maybe her cousin would turn out to be worth knowing, too. He was younger, and kind of small, so he would probably be easy enough to deal with. Although Josiah did find himself wondering why the kid would claim that they had hung out together during the Christmas break. That didn't make any sense.

Study hall gave Josiah more time to think about his social life, or lack of one. It was unexplored territory. By the time he had entered third grade, he realized that he was a bit different from most of the other kids in his class. His interests were more adult than the things that occupied his peers. While they scampered through the day, hither and thither, their behavior driven by impulse and their scattered emotions, Josiah generally took the time to think before he acted. None of his classmates really disliked Josiah. They just didn't understand him. And to be fair, he really didn't understand them either.

If he were honest with himself, Josiah would probably acknowledge that for a while it hurt him to realize that classmates he thought he could like, really didn't have much interest in him. But he was a very practical boy. It didn't take too much time at all for him to realize that there wasn't much point in attempting to foster social connections that weren't likely to be reciprocated. He grew accustomed to spending most of his time alone. After a while it began to feel much more comfortable, even safer, when he was alone.

Josiah went through the rest of his elementary education and middle school without forming any strong social bonds with peers. It perplexed his teachers to find a bright and curious child who didn't seem interested in having much to do with his classmates. They worried about him. But after a while, they recognized that was just the way he was wired and they stopped trying to help him fix a problem that he didn't think needed fixing.

It was only after he arrived in high school that Josiah started to find himself again developing a vague, new interest in peers. After thorough research, he decided that the change in his attractions was likely just the result of puberty. Some of his new interest was in girls and involved at least some fascination with their developing bodies. He had started physical changes of his own late in his eighth grade year. It only stood to reason that might have helped to spark interest in the changes that others around him were also going through.

Unfortunately, vague new interests didn't result in changes in Josiah's behavior. Even if he was more curious about the people around him — some of them, he noticed, were even starting to act more mature — it was hard for him to change years of social habits. And in high school, there were fewer teachers concerned about facilitating social connections among their students. Most students had already figured out how to make those connections. Those that hadn't yet, would probably learn those lessons on their own. High school teachers had more important things to teach their charges.

Lost in his ruminations, Josiah was barely aware of a ruckus taking place in the nearby science wing of the high school. It wasn't the sort of thing that would have ordinarily attracted his attention anyway. And on this occasion, he was quite deep in thought.

The final period of Josiah's school day found him in Psychology class. It was an upper level elective class that was usually filled with juniors and seniors. When Josiah was choosing his sophomore classes at the end of the previous school year, his guidance counselor, Ms. Grissom, had mentioned the class and suggested that she could make sure he was accepted, even as a sophomore, if he wanted to register. Her interest was rather mysterious, but Josiah decided that the class did sound interesting and he had found it on his schedule when his sophomore year started in August.

Josiah hadn't been disappointed by his decision. Ms. Porter was a dynamic young teacher who managed to make the class interesting for all her students. And Josiah discovered that he had a real interest in the subject. It took a while for the theoretical to turn practical, but eventually Josiah started to realize that he could take what he was learning in his class and use it to better understand himself and the behavior of his peers. Ms. Porter really helped Josiah and all of her students learn how to connect what they were learning to their own lives.

Josiah hurried out of his study hall and was in his seat and waiting for Psychology class to begin before any of the other students arrived. Slowly they began to trickle in. When the bell rang to start the period, Ms. Porter glanced up to a classroom that was only about three-quarters full. It was rare for her class to begin without every seat filled and everyone ready for her to start the lesson. The teacher decided to wait a few minutes.

Five minutes later, two junior and a senior girl filed into the room. One looked bored and vaguely disgusted. The other two were trying to bring giggles under control.

The older girl apologized to Ms. Porter. "I'm sorry we're late. There was some trouble in Mr. Waxon's class. He and Mr. Harding took a few of the boys," her tone was full of disdain, "to the office. I don't know when they'll be here." She delivered her announcement with an air of firm disapproval and took her seat.

"Thank you, Jennifer." Ms. Porter glanced around the room. "I guess we'll have to start without them."

She opened the laptop on her desk, made a few adjustments, and turned on the video projector.

"I thought we could spend our first few days back from vacation on a bit of a fun project. It won't hurt those absent if they miss part of the explanation, although I hope that all of you will share information with them if they have questions."

Josiah was caught up in Ms. Porter's explanation as she described the project.

"The purpose of this class is to teach the fundamentals of psychology. Some of you will use what you learn to go on to college and pursue careers in psychology, or perhaps sociology. Some of you will use what you learn to build a foundation for careers in other fields that involve dealing with people. For some of you it will just provide useful tools to better understand people any time you deal with them in your daily lives."

Ms. Porter was entering information into her laptop while she spoke to the class. Josiah admired her ability to focus on both activities. He noticed that a title page was projected on the wall at the front of the classroom. The only information it provided was four large letters: 'MBTI'.

"This activity is going to focus on an aspect of psychology that will be useful for all of you: better understanding yourself and how to interact more effectively with other people."

A new page flashed up on the screen. 'Myers-Briggs Type Indicator'.

"There are a lot of personality tests out there," Ms. Porter went on. "They range from simple quizzes that you might find in self-interest magazines, right up through the rather sophisticated instruments that are used by large corporations when they are hiring people to work for them. Some of them are mostly just for fun. Some can provide results that are much more meaningful. Although I should add… " she glanced around the classroom. "Does anyone know where Ian is today?"

Jennifer spoke up immediately. "He's in the office. With Russ and Daniel."

"Oh!" Ms. Porter was surprised. "I didn't realize he was in your Physics class. Anyway," she continued, "For Ian's benefit, because I'm sure his mother would want me to add some clarification, no personality test is comprehensive. And there's nothing determinative about any of them. Even if a test tells you something about yourself, it's still open to interpretation, circumstances, and the result may change over time.

"I do like the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator, although some experts in the field claim its results aren't completely reliable. The basis for the test was a combination of research into personality by Katharine Briggs, some observations her daughter made about how her husband viewed the world, and insights that Katharine Briggs and Isabel Briggs Myers derived from work by Swiss psychiatrist Carl Jung that was published in 1921, while Briggs was doing her research. They created a personality assessment that evolved over the years. About fifty years ago it reached the form in which it's used today. It's called the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator."

She paused to let the class absorb her explanation.

"Since we're all recovering from vacation," Ms. Porter said, "I thought we might spend this week talking about some of the different personality tests you will run across in your lives. But I also thought it might be fun for each of you to take one of those tests, what I consider one of the better assessments available today, and explore the results."

She paused so she didn't have to compete with the groans that had erupted at the word 'test'.

"Okay," after the angst had subsided, "You need to understand that there's nothing complicated about this test. There aren't any trick questions. In fact, a few seconds to think about how you feel is the only knowledge you even need to take this test. And… " she drew it out, "it won't affect your grade."

She paused again to allow the wave of relief to pass through her class.

"The test is very simple. This one has a series of questions. Each one asks only how you feel about a specific statement. You will read a short statement, decide whether you agree or disagree with the statement, perhaps strongly agree or strongly disagree with the statement, or whether you don't feel one way or the other. These are very simple questions about how you feel. Fill in the circle that corresponds to your opinion. Do it for one hundred questions. And that's it!

"You can complete the assessment anywhere. I'm giving it to you for homework, but it's so simple you might be able to finish it on your ride home tonight. You have until the end of the week to return it to me. When the results from the assessment have been returned, I'll give them to you and we can discuss the results.

"The results for this test aren't anything to worry about. All they will show is that there are ways in which we think about things that make each of us different from other people. Not better or worse. Just different. Some of those differences can even be strengths! But I won't make anyone discuss their result in class if they aren't comfortable doing so."

Josiah thought that Ms. Porter might have glanced at him when she said this. He was relieved.

Ms. Porter took a handful of thin booklets off her desk and distributed a few to each student sitting at the front of the class.

"Please pass these back. Make sure that everyone gets one. Take a minute to look them over and ask questions, if you'd like. But it's your homework assignment… due Friday," she reiterated. "We can talk a little bit about how the test works later this week, but I really don't want you to even think about that when you're taking the test. Just answer each question as honestly as you can. That will give you the best result. And as I said, the results aren't anything to worry about."

She was interrupted when two older boys and a school administrator entered the classroom.

"Russ! Daniel!" Ms. Porter said. "It's so kind of you to join us! Thank you, Mr. Harding." She shared a glance with the administrator, who nodded to her, scowled at the boys, and left the room.

"Will Ian be joining us?" she asked.

The boys smirked at each other and shrugged for the teacher's benefit. She sighed.

"All right. I'll explain what we're doing again. Would some of you help answer any of Ian's questions about this assignment… whenever he returns to us," her expression hinted at both annoyance and mild concern.

Several of the girls put their heads together. Josiah didn't understand why, but it made him feel uncomfortable. He wondered if maybe he shouldn't try to find a way to explain the assignment to Ian.

Josiah was intrigued by the personality test. He skimmed through the instructions on his bus ride home. Just as Ms. Porter had promised, it looked very easy. He glanced at some of the questions. He couldn't really figure out why it was important how he felt about spending time alone or spending time with a lot of people. The answers seemed obvious. But he was still fascinated by the process of the test.

He considered researching more about the MBTI when he got home. But he recalled Ms. Porter's instruction that they answer the questions without worrying about what the results meant. He decided that he should do his research after he had completed the test.

As the bus passed south through East Grange, Josiah began wondering what had happened in Mr. Waxon's sixth period Physics class. It seemed likely that something pretty big had taken place. Vice Principals didn't often deliver students to class in person. He hadn't heard any rumors in homeroom or while waiting for the bus, but Josiah figured that there had been real drama in that classroom.

He also wondered why that red-haired kid never made it to their class — and what he was doing in a junior-senior level Physics class for that matter. As Josiah saw it, there was a pretty good chance that some of the older boys had been bullying the freshman. But he couldn't figure out why the girls had been a few minutes late to class, too. The pieces didn't quite add up. It wasn't really his business, but it always kind of bothered Josiah when he couldn't make sense of a situation.

Josiah was about to stick his nose back in the MBTI booklet when he noticed a flash of dark red in the corner of his vision. The bus had been picking up speed as it fled town, but Josiah recognized the red-haired kid from his Psychology class standing next to a car in front of a small grey and green cape style house. Josiah didn't notice any injuries, but the kid was looking down dejectedly while some blonde lady appeared to be chewing him out over something.

For a brief moment, Josiah had an irrational urge to jump off the bus and share his Psychology homework with the boy. By the time he had a chance to think about the idea, the bus was a hundred yards farther south and travelling even faster.

Josiah shrugged. Maybe he'd see the kid in class tomorrow. Judging from the attitude of the older kids in his class, he thought that maybe he really ought to be the one to tell the kid about their assignment. There had been something unsettling about the glances and whispers shared between the older kids when Ms. Porter had asked them to share the assignment with missing students.