Out of the Closet

by Victor Thomas

Chapter 3

Javier

Give it back, faggot. I repeated the locker room discussion in my head while I walked to the parking area. I'm probably just over analyzing it, I thought.

I had hardly prepared for people's reactions before coming out. Like most of my actions, it had been an impulsive decision. A rough morning and my mother's annoying questions about a girlfriend had led to a heated argument. And there I was, telling my mother I liked to suck dick. Not that I ever have, but I want to. The choice of words had been somewhat vulgar, so the message sunk in fast, and suddenly, she wasn't interested in my nonexistent girlfriend at all.

The only thing I regretted was that I had said it when my dumbass brother, Jorge, sat at the same breakfast table. This only put a new tool in his arsenal to torment me, but also, I couldn't trust my big brother to keep the information to himself. Telling the coach and my teammates before the word spread was the best damage control.

Sorry, Jorge. They already know. I smirked at the idea of my brother failing miserably at shocking everybody. The coach had taken the news well, and despite the awkward moment in the locker room, my teammates hadn't gone nuts either. Chris' reaction wasn't the best possible, but Chris was Chris. I held high hopes that even he would come to his senses.

As I walked toward my car, I relaxed my shoulders. It had been more difficult to come out to the team than I wanted to admit, but it was done now. For sure, the entire school would know by morning, but so what. I don't give a shit I decided and turned my gaze up.

At the same moment, my eyes reached someone up ahead, leaning against the brick wall of the locker room. He looked vaguely familiar, and as much as I didn't want to stare it almost seemed like an invisible force pulled our eyes together and forced us to study each other. Our eyes locked. As I got closer, I recognized Kenny Sherman. He was a friend of Chris'. They ate lunch and walked to class together pretty much every day.

Despite sensing his eyes on me, I tried to walk as normally as possible. I couldn't help stealing glances at his handsome face. Shit, he must have noticed. I cursed in my mind and checked him one more time. He looked cute in his black jeans and a white t-shirt, but the best parts were his thoughtful blue eyes and the perfect lips that formed a shy smile before both of us turned our heads away.

I looked back at the ground and smiled as I kept walking. Kenny, a senior, and mostly likely not gay, was definitely my type. Intelligent looking, a hint of lean muscle, and he obviously cared about the way he looked. I just couldn't get his divine eyes and lips out of my mind.

If you keep your eyes open, high school isn't such a bad place after all, I thought, daring one last look before the path turned behind the building.

I continued around the corner of the field house to the parking lot where I had parked my car earlier. I let my mind wander to Kenny. It wasn't until I reached my hand out to open the car door that I noticed what was waiting for me there. I froze, and the smile vanished from my face.

There, spray painted all across the side of my car, was the word, 'FAG'.

For a moment, I just stared at the car, my blood boiling in my veins. Then I walked around it, like I was sneaking up on some rare creature to photograph, and every time my foot touched the ground, my anger mounted. When I saw the hopelessly busted tire on the passenger side, I lost control.

My voice raised to a volume it had never reached before, and a slew of curse words flooded from my mouth, echoing to the other side of the parking lot. I let out a primal yell and kicked the flat tire as hard as I could, grimacing in pain out of reflex, although I didn't feel it through my rage.

"What the fuck have you done?" I asked, addressing the vandals who were long gone.

Despite my efforts to silence it, a small voice inside my head asked myself the same question.