I called Ryan the next morning to see if he would give me a ride to school. Since I had not gone to school the day before, no one had seen me or knew what had happened.
"Shit, Scott, what the hell happened?" he asked as soon as I climbed into his car. "If you don't want to talk about it, I understand, but I'm worried about you."
"Ashton and his friends jumped me on my way home the night before last," I said. "I had just left Brian. I was walking down the sidewalk; they grabbed me and threw me in the back of a truck. They drove me out into the country and beat the crap out of me. It was the same guys who beat me up before."
"I'm so sorry, Scott. I bet you were terrified. I would have been."
"I was. I thought they were going to kill me. It hurt so bad I wouldn't have minded dying just to escape the pain. I'm surprised I don't have any broken bones."
"I can't even imagine what that would be like," he said. "Did you have to go to the hospital again?"
"I spent the night and most of yesterday in the hospital," I said, "but I'm alright. I'd have to say it's the worst experience of my life so far. The beating wasn't the worst of it, though."
I grew silent. I didn't want him or anyone else to know what else they'd done to me. it was so humiliating and it made me feel dirty.
"You don't have to tell me anything you don't want to, Scott," he said.
I wondered if he suspected what had happened.
"Thanks."
"So, are you going to the police?" he asked.
"No, there's no point in that," I said. "They'd just deny it anyway, and the cops wouldn't do anything. They didn't before, so why should this time be any different."
"I see your point," he said. "Still, they shouldn't be allowed to get away with that shit."
"They won't, I promise. But can we talk about something else?"
We made our way to our lockers. It was a familiar routine, comforting in it's own way. I felt safer with him by side, but I doubted I'd ever feel truly safe again as long as I was going to this school.
Everyone was looking at my black eye and bruised face. Some of the guys smirked, thinking it was funny the school fairy had got his butt kicked again. Some of the girls looked at me with pity. I was used to people looking at me like a freak on display, but it seemed somehow worse now.
I didn't set eyes on any of my attackers until the end of third period. I walked out of class, and my eyes met Ashton's. He grinned at me knowingly, then laughed in my face. I involuntary flinched when he raised his hand to run it through his hair, and that only made him laugh more. Part of me wanted to punch him in the face, but part of me feared him as I never had before. I didn't realize until he walked away that I was shaking.
I crossed Jeremy's path in a nearly deserted hallway before I made it to my fourth period class. He walked straight toward me and slammed me into a wall. A small cry of pain escaped from my lips as my bruised back hit the wall.
He brought his lips close to my ear and whispered, "you're a fine piece of ass, Scott. We're gonna have to get together again real soon."
A second later, Mark came flying out of nowhere, plowed into Jeremy, and sent him crashing to the floor. A small crowd of sightseers gathered.
"Get the fuck away from him. Now!" snarled Mark.
"What's the matter? I thought Scott was someone else's bitch, not yours."
Mark went for him, but a couple of guys grabbed him and held him back. Jeremy grinned and looked around at his little audience before looking at me again.
"Oh, yeah, Scott, I forgot to thank you for that great blow job you gave me the other night. You're a real pro."
I glared at him, but didn't dare do more. Mark fought to escape, but couldn't break free. Jeremy laughed and went on his way. When he was out of sight, the guys holding Mark released him, and he walked to my side.
"How'd you get this?" he asked, taking my chin in his hand and examining my face.
"It's a little gift courtesy of Jeremy, Ashton, Steve, and Alex."
"Does Brian know?"
"Not yet, but I hope to see him tonight, so he'll find out."
"We've got to get those guys. I'll tell Ryan."
"No, Mark, wait. Ryan knows already. He gave me a ride to school this morning. I don't want you guys getting involved. I'm going to take care of this myself."
"Good," he said, "although I wouldn't mind helping you out. Those guys need their asses kicked. So, what are you gonna do?"
"I don't know yet," I said, "but the less you know, the better."
In the last few minutes before lunch, I grew tense. The bell rang. I sprang to my feet, feeling like part of a cuckoo clock that performed the same action each hour, such as a little wooden man who appeared out of one hole so he could disappear into another. Or, maybe a wooden mouse would be more apt, Ashton a grinning tomcat eager to stalk his prey. Just yesterday he had stayed on the opposite side of the hallway and matched paces with me, even when it meant the other students were forced to get out of his way.
Today was much worse. He stayed directly behind me. I glanced over my shoulder a few times before moving to the middle of the hallway, but it didn't help. When I checked again, he was still right behind me. I only needed to reach the cafeteria. I should be safe there. If I made it at all. I could see the rows of tables and a gray cloudy day beyond the wall of windows, but the light was soon blocked out as he passed and then stepped in front of me, blocking my way.
"Tell you what," he said, holding up a five-dollar bill. "I'll buy you lunch if you suck my dick."
I felt my face start to burn.
"I'm not that hungry" I said, my hands shaking out of anger rather than fear. "In fact, I'd rather starve to death than touch you!"
The five-dollar bill crumpled into oblivion as the hand holding it balled into a fist. He slammed this against the nearest locker, the resulting boom so loud that I flinched before bracing to defend myself. And I would defend myself. I have no doubt that I can take Ashton one on one. He's too much of a pussy however, to fight me without his friends to back him up. The hallway around us had grown quiet, everyone hoping to see a fight.
"Then starve," he growled in a low voice. "As if I fucking care."
He lumbered forward. I pressed myself against the row of lockers to avoid being trampled. As expected, he kept going, continuing down the hallway to ruin someone else's day, no doubt.
The harassment didn't stop. Right after lunch I have P.E. class. I was on the basketball court, doing my best to remain focused on the game. Ever since I had been outed back in September, I was always the last person to be chosen when teams were formed. Today, I was on the shirtless side. Why couldn't the school just buy different colored jerseys we could wear? Unfortunately, Ashton and Jeremy were on the same team as me, which was uncomfortable to say the least.
I watched as he just held onto the ball, not passing it or moving toward the goal. He just stood there, swiping at anyone who dared to get to close to him.
"Stop fucking around, Mitchell!" the coach growled from the side of the court.
He didn't seem to hear him.
"How many laps around the gym do you want to run today?" the coach hollered.
Ashton still didn't respond, but the glare implied he was listening. I was starting to get a little pissed off just standing around, so I ran up behind him and grabbed the ball, passing it to Todd, who was on the opposite side of the court.
"Hey, we're on the same team!" he snorted, stomping in my direction.
"I don't give a fuck, Ashton," I said. "You're being a dumb ass."
He was in my face now, attempting to stare me down.
"I want to play," I said, refusing to back down. "If you don't, stay out of the way."
His lip curled and he lunged forward.
I held my ground.
"Bring it on, motherfucker," I said. "I'll kick your pussy ass."
"Focus on the game," the coach said, after blowing his whistle, "or you'll both be running laps."
I turned and got into the game. He could hit me from behind, but I doubted he'd actually do it. With the coach watching us, he'd probably get suspended. Nothing happened though, but I expected he would try and attack me again if I gave him the chance.
The rest of the game went fine, even with Ashton and Jeremy trying to intimidate me. My team managed to win, despite their behavior. Although, when we returned to the locker room, it was obvious that my problems weren't over.
Ashton usually went to take a shower after gym class, as had I in the past. I didn't dare do it now, however. Today he sat on the bench, still wearing the school issued gym shorts. His elbows were resting on his legs, that were spread wider. He had his back to his own locker so he could stare at me. I hurried to get dressed, while bracing for an attack.
"How about ten bucks?" he said.
The locker room was starting to clear out. I glanced over my shoulder.
"Instead of five," he said when our eyes met.
Jesus Christ, not this again. I clenched my jaw and turned around.
"For what?" I challenged.
There was no way in hell that he would say it in front of the other guys. Or so I thought.
"For a blowjob," he said. "That's all fags are good for, isn't it?"
The other guys laughed while looking at me.
"Shut the fuck up," I said, before slamming my locker closed.
A couple of guys sucked in air, like they expected me to get pummeled again. A shadow arose from behind me, blocking out the light. I turned around. Ashton was standing menacingly behind me, with Jeremy standing a few feet away. He shrugged.
"Whatever," he said before finally turning toward his own locker.
I moved farther down the aisle before sitting down to put on my shoes. I was just tying the second one when sweaty shorts smacked me in the side of my face. I glanced over in time to see Ashton pulling up his boxers, but even the brief glimpse of his butt cheek couldn't quell my anger.
"Would you fucking stop, you stupid fuck!" I snarled.
Which was a mistake because I saw that I was alone with him and Jeremy in the locker room. Well, aside from a scrawny kid whose eyes were like saucers before he hurried for the exit. I was tempted to do the same. Instead, I tossed the gym shorts back at him.
"Leave me alone!"
While I finished tying my shoes, some wadded up bills were thrown at me. One hit my shoulder, the others missed and skidded to a halt on the floor in front of me.
"That's twenty bucks," he said. "Take it or leave it. But you have to blow Jeremy as well."
They both laughed and grabbed their dicks through their jeans.
I stood and picked up the money with a trembling hand and stuffed it into my pocket.
"Fine, you win," I said, marching over to him. "I'll take your money."
Ashton just stood there, as if unsure what to do.
I laughed humorlessly. I spun around, grabbed my backpack and walked out of the locker room; certain I'd be crushed at any moment. But I wasn't. I made it to my next class unscathed.
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