Secrets

by Victor Thomas

Chapter 9

Carson couldn't even look me in the face the next day at school. I could hardly blame him. He probably thought I was going to beat the shit out of him, and, believe me, I'd thought about it. I felt betrayed.

I was uncomfortable around him, too. Just a few hours before, I'd seen his bare ass… no, I didn't want to think about that. The image was already burned into my mind, and I was going to have a hard enough time getting rid of it without dwelling on it. If it had been anyone else under him, it wouldn't have been a hundredth as bad. Hell, if I'd walked in on him doing some girl from school, I wouldn't have even cared.

A disturbing thought occurred to me. I knew for a fact that he had screwed Terri Whitehead. So had most of the guys, including me. He had done it with my mom, then Terri, and then I'd done Terri. What was that they say about not only sleeping with someone, but with everyone they'd slept with. It was almost incestuous. I was gonna be sick. Carson had much to answer for.

He sat near me at lunch, but not as close as usual. He'd completely avoided my gaze. If I'd been doing his mom and he'd found out I probably wouldn't have been looking at him in the face either.

He pretty much had to look at me at work, and when he did so for the first time, he was pale and trembling. When I moved my arm, he actually flinched.

"I'm not going to hit you."

Those were the first words I'd spoken to him since the incident.

"I'm really sorry," he said.

"No, you're not. If you were sorry, you would've stopped doing it with my mom a long time ago. You're only sorry you got caught."

"Bryce, I…"

"Do you even like me?" I asked him angrily, "or do you just pretend to be my friend so you can fuck my mom?"

The gym was fairly crowded, but the front counter was well away from most of the machines, and no one was within earshot.

"Did you fuck my sister too, when she lived at home?

"No! Bryce, listen, I don't know how much your mom has told you, but she seemed so lonely and I was… well, you know what it's like! I used to think I'd go crazy if I couldn't have sex. I didn't set out to seduce your mom. I'd never even thought about it, but that first day, when I hugged her, I couldn't help it. I lost control. I needed it so bad and… well, I guess I did come onto your mom, but I hadn't planned it. It just happened."

"Yeah, and I bet you just happened to get it on with her every time you came to see me!"

"No, Bryce. I'll admit, sometimes when I'm there to see you, we do stuff, but it's not what you're thinking. Mostly, I've come over when you're not there. I didn't want you to know. I was afraid you'd freak out or tell me we weren't friends anymore. It's not just sex between your mom and me, not anymore."

"Yeah, but what about Terri Whitehead? I know for a fact you fucked her after you'd started in with my mom."

"I did, and it was probably a mistake, but that was months ago, and it was just sex back then. Things have changed though, Bryce. I really care about your mom. I love her."

The sincere tone of his voice hit me. It meant far more than his actual words. He meant it. He really meant it. My mood softened.

"If you ever hurt her, I will fucking kill you. I don't mean this as an idle threat. It will happen! She's been through enough. I'll fucking beat you to death! You got it?"

He nodded, clearly terrified, but also hopeful.

"Does this mean you're okay with your mom and me?"

"I wouldn't go that far, but my mom's private life is her business, not mine. This whole thing is pretty fucked up because she's my mom and you're my best friend, but I'll just have to live with it."

"We're still best friends?" he asked.

"I don't know but I'm willing to try. I can't give you any guarantees."

He smiled.

"Don't you breathe a word of this to anyone else. If you tell anyone that you and my mom…"

"I won't! I swear! I've never told anyone. You won't believe how hard it has been to keep my mouth shut when I've been… well, I won't tell anyone."

"Okay, you two don't have to sneak around behind my back anymore. We're all adults here, sort of. I don't want you two doing stuff in front of me, though; it's just too weird. If you do it in her room or wherever, that's okay with me, I guess."

"Of course," he said, eager to agree.

"Damn, this is fucked up," I said.

He obviously didn't know what to say to that, so he remained silent.

"I'm gonna work out," I said, leaving him alone at the counter.

I hit the machines hard, working off some of my aggression. There were times when I just wanted to beat the crap out of someone. Usually that mood hit me for no reason at all, but at the moment I felt like pounding Carson.

I piled on more weight than usual. I strained to press the heavy weights away from my chest. Feeling my muscles give their all didn't stop me from thinking about Carson and my mom, but it did provide an outlet for my hostility. It was as effective as pounding a punching bag. He should've been grateful we were in the gym. Straining my guts out may have been the only thing saving his face from my fist.

If he had been doing someone else's mom, I wouldn't have minded. I would have probably have found it funny and even kind of hot. He was having an affair with my mother, however, so it was hard to take. I wasn't going to cause problems. She obviously wanted to be with him, and maybe he made her feel young again or something. I wanted her to be happy.

If he had thrown his relationship with her in my face, I would've kicked his ass, but it wasn't like that. He was afraid it would mess up our friendship, and he obviously cared about her.

I thought these thoughts as I was benching, working on my pecs. I realized I wasn't paying much attention to what I was doing, which was just asking for a painful injury. I tried to get my mind on lifting.

I could feel my pecs tense and flex as I pressed the bar away from my chest. I loved to feel my muscles working. I could also feel the strain in my arms, back, and shoulders. The bench press was a chest exercise, but it worked a lot of other muscles, too. Due to the extra weight I'd put on the bar, I was actually shaking as I pumped out the reps. It wasn't my usual method of working out, but this was about burning off aggression, not putting on muscle.

I nearly dropped the bar when a realization dawned on me. I quickly finished my set and sat up, staring at Carson. I swallowed hard. What if he and my mom got married? Carson would be my dad!

I'm living in a soap opera, I thought. All I need to complete the plot is to find out that he is really my long-lost brother.

There was little chance of that, thank god. I cleared my head of errant thoughts and returned to my workout.